A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've been in a serious relationship for about 7 months and my boyfriend and I are deeply in love. He actually moved to another state and got a different job to be closer to me. We work well together and have great communication. We're both confident in who we are as individuals and who we are together. We have the same core beliefs when it comes to religion, raising children, relationships, family, etc. I just really believe that we compliment each other well. We have talked about marriage since maybe our second month and it has steady gotten more serious until we went ring shopping a few weeks ago and I fell in love with a rare cut diamond. To my shock, he bought it and made arrangements to have a ring made. I expected to be scared, unsure, or to have second thoughts but, after the surprise wore off none of those emotions came. Instead, I was excited! I realized that even though I knew I wanted to marry him someday, the fact that someday was sooner rather than later, made me happy not uncertain. I felt completely in love and ready to be married.We had already decided on the date of May 26th, 2012, months ago, probably sometime in April. Though, recently I've started thinking about having a shorter engagement. This week I decided to finally go all-the-way (that sounds so corny...lol..) and have sex for the first time (ever for me, I was a virgin) with him. He was a bit apprehensive and kept asking me if I was sure. He was really great about it. Anyway, though he hasn't proposed yet, I know he will soon (after he asks my parents of course, we're a bit old-fashioned that way). And now I'm thinking that May 2012 is too far away, too long of an engagement (he's always thought this, but wanted me to be happy and I loved that date). I was thinking about changing to maybe June 2011, but, I think that maybe that's because I recently lost my virginity to him and just really want to be with him. I think maybe I'm just being extra emotional, should I wait a month or two before changing or deciding to change the date? Or am I just being paranoia about the virginity thing and should realistically talk to him about the moving the date up?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (5 August 2010):
 You are wanting to move the date up because you have filled all the boxes in your check off sheet. Got the ring, got the first sex, got a solid relationship. In my opinion you are right. What is the point of a long engagement? Pick the dress and the flowers and the venue and get it done.
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