A
male
age
51-59,
*kullmaster333
writes:Hello. My girlfriend and I have been together for almost two years and living together for almost one year. Today she asked me if it is OK for her son and her X brother n law to come stay the weekend with us. I was totally shocked she asked. I felt somewhat betrayed among other feelings. Not to mention her X has multiple DUI charges and even felony theft and uses multiple drugs including crack.Am I the bad guy for saying no? She sure acts as if I am. I need advice, please.Thanks
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 April 2010): what do you have against the ex brother in law? I understand not wanting the ex and his issues, but hes not responsible for his brother! He was her family for her whole married life! You dont allow anyone in your home who has rotten kinfolks? Guess my hubby wouldnt be welcome, because my father in law is a convicted felon and a pervert. Would i be welcome because mine was a preacher? Or would i be judged by my fil? What am i missing here? Its your house love, and you can refuse hospitality anyone you choose but if i were your gal, this would be a deal breaker. Im judging by what you said... I just cant see what the problem is.
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reader, skullmaster333 +, writes (16 April 2010):
skullmaster333 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all for a variety of views and opinions. They have been well accepted.
My user name is nothing satanic by the way as one user suggested. God bless.
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male
reader, skullmaster333 +, writes (16 April 2010):
skullmaster333 is verified as being by the original poster of the question1605
Do you feel better now that you have vented a little bit?
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male
reader, skullmaster333 +, writes (16 April 2010):
skullmaster333 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionActually her X and her X brother n law have about the same background.
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reader, skullmaster333 +, writes (16 April 2010):
skullmaster333 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWOW 1605, who ever you are. Talk about me passing judgement, what did you do with my user name? If you take 1 away you have 332. So what. Dollar store version? Crap dude, It sounds like you have some inner anger you need to release... I'm here and my email is *email address removed*.By the way, read before you answer next time and you will see he has a well established rap sheet.OK, now, since you and "WE" are passing judgement on my user name, tell me, what are "WE" going to do?For your satisfaction and to calm your anti satanic mind, or is it satanic mind, I purchased a custom motorcycle many years ago. It was covered with skulls. The mileage on it was 333 miles. I named it skullmaster333 and I use that as my user name as well.OK hipocrit, I look forward to hearing from you. *email address removed* By the way, ydms stands for yesterday don't mean shit. Now there is one less question you will have to ask me.
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reader, skullmaster333 +, writes (16 April 2010):
skullmaster333 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHer X bro n law has never been here before. I have met him on several occasions. He is a very nice person.
It's not the drugs so much as it being her X's brother. When I divorced I severed all tithes with her and her family. I felt that we divorced so why continue past memories with her family? To me it only hurts.
Oh, my girlfriends son and her X bro n law are good friends. I can't help but fear he may travel the same path. Her son is only 20 so he looks up to the X.
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reader, skullmaster333 +, writes (16 April 2010):
skullmaster333 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThe X brother n law is 45, the same age as my girlfriend and I.
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reader, chigirl  +, writes (16 April 2010):
 Has he ever visited before? I say he deserves one honest chance at not being judged before you know him. If he's never come over before and you never really met the guy, why not give him the chance. It's not like the brother is her x, he's the x's brother.
If he's come over before and you simply can't stand him I understand your reasons to say no and think you should stick with it.
May I ask why her x brother in law would be visiting at the same time as her son? Or why the x brother in law is visiting at all?
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reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (15 April 2010):
Her sons, of course. Her drug addicted, thieving drunk ex brother in law, no chance.
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reader, L.A LATINA +, writes (15 April 2010):
 well how old is the x brother inlaw? because i dont feel nothing wrong because i let my X'S girlfreind son come over with my son and stay the weekend ..just because you dont like the guy dont mean you should take it out on his brother especailly if he is young he might like hanging with his nephew i mean she is with you so i dont think you have any worries..good luck
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reader, skullmaster333 +, writes (15 April 2010):
skullmaster333 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you. It is my house by the way. I have always welcomed her son. Both of them.
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reader, skullmaster333 +, writes (15 April 2010):
skullmaster333 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you very much. I am feeling better already.
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reader, Universe Man +, writes (15 April 2010):
She wants her son to come visit too, right? So probably she just wants to put up with the druggie in order to spend some time with her son? Sounds reasonable to me.
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reader, CaringGuy +, writes (15 April 2010):
I think you're right. There is no harm in her remaining friends, but he's an ex brother in law who has multiple DUI charges, theft charges and uses drugs. That's just asking for someone to walk in and steal everything while your back is turned. You don't need someone like that in your life, let alone your house.
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reader, Myau  +, writes (15 April 2010):
 You should let her son stay, but I can understand why you wouldn't want the ex brother there.
I would however given him 1 chance (and only 1 chance) and if he was nice then that's fine but if hes a ^&%$ in anyway throw him on the street.
Why does she want to associate with him anyway?
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reader, Moo's Mum +, writes (15 April 2010):
 You should definately be OK with her son coming to stay that's her flesh and blood and she deserves to have a relationship with him as does he. The brother-in-law I can understand your feelings about. Is it your house you are living in or hers? If it's hers you probably can't say much but if it's your house you are perfectly within your rights to assert that you don't feel comfortable with that type of person in your house.
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