A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Me and my ex boyfriend recently broke up because we are not compatible. I was pretty mutual but I still have feelings for him. He is not romantic or compassionate enough for me. He found it difficult to support me when my best friend died but he did lovely practical things for me.One month on we have started talking again and he has offered to do some repairs on my house. I'm not sure if this is a good idea. I dont plan on sleeping with him or gettimg back with him but I do still quite fancy him.I am short of money so could do with his help but am I playing with fire?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 January 2014): Thanks guys for your input. Futureauthor I have never used anyone in my life. I did a lot for him while we were together including decorating and helping with a house move. I supported him emotionally through a lot too. Please don't judge me on the fact I have agreed to him helping me with some repairs.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 January 2014): Ps. I have never slept with anyone I'm not in a relationship with. I have to trust a man with my heart before I can do this. That's just not me. Sometimes I wish I could be fwb but I couldn't...
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A
male
reader, no nonsense Aidan +, writes (12 January 2014):
Put it this way, exes becoming friends only works where there is mutual care for each other, but mutual lack of attraction. This is not the case here: you have feelings for him, it’s likely he does for you too. If you’re not going to get back together than keep your distance from each other as this isn’t fair to either of you.
I wish you all the very best.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 January 2014): I agree with WiseOwlE. I actually think you know that what you're doing is wrong, otherwise you wouldn't have posted on here.
You're basically leading him on and using him which is really quite spiteful. I think you should be honest with him and leave him to get on with his life.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 January 2014): Yes you are playing with fire. You are using him. You are playing the damsel in distress. "I need work done, but I have little money."
So rather than go no-contact as you should, you're forming a "friend's with benefits" business exchange. Which will lead to lots of appreciation, and regretted sex. You're walking on land mines, my dear!
You wouldn't have asked, if you didn't think you were.
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