A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend and I are on a break, but she has told me that just just needs some space and time for a little, and then we can be back together, when she has sorted her personal things out. She has said she won't do anything with anybody else in this time, and even though we are on a break, we still see each other and hang out for a bit most days etc.She is a member of a forum thing, however asked me not to look on it, she wants it to stay private, and I said that I'd honour that.It was wrong of me, but recently I had a look on this site. I know it was wrong of me to do so when I had said that I wouldn't. However, what I found, has mde me a little.... confused? Worried?I found a post saying that I had cheated on her, when I haven't.:SBut moreso.. her signiture states that she loves a guy, we will call "Mr X". Who I know to be one of her friends.I also found a video of shout outs to people on the forum. His shout out was saying that he's hot?On her facebook he left her a message saying "Last night was ;]". I know that like, physically, nothing happened between them, because she was on msn last night talking to me. And he lives in another town.I asked her about what that was, and she said it was just a joke betwen friends, kind of like saying "your mom was good last night" etc etc, which i thought was fair enough. But she replied to him saying "We should have more nights like last night :)" :SAm I over reacting? Like, is it possible that idk, something happened, like, through texts or on the phone or something?Or are really just friends?How would I bring it up with her, without hurting her by saying I went on this forum? I don't want her to lose her trust in me.
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female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (31 July 2008):
 But then the only aletrnative is to let her have this break, and let her take the lead and let you know if and when she wants to try again. After this so called break.
If you can do that, without knowing the details, then do it. If you think it is better in the long run. I guess it depends if you would be willing to give her another try if she has been elsewhere.
Doesn't sound like a lot of trust on either side though?
c xxxxxx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionth eproblem is, i have seriously damaged her trust in the past, and we're working on building that up. That was one of the catalysts that led us to a break.
So if i tell her I had a look, it would hurt trust again, and could be more severe than it might seem at first. Idk what to do.
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A
female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (31 July 2008):
I would just come out and say it. Say you are a bit confused about whats going on, and its because you care so much about her thats why you sneeked a peek.
But i would be highly sceptical about this so called 'friend' also to be honest. She may want some space to see what happens with him, and keeping you on the back burner, if it doesn't materialise and he's not the nice guy like you seem to be! which is a pretty shitty thing to do, if that is the case. But there is only one way to know for sure, and thats ask her. You're always best off being honest, hopefully she will be honest in return.
C xxxx
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