A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I am hopelessly in love with my boss. We are very close and we talk about everything. All I can do is fantasize what it would be like to hold him, to kiss him, to make love with him. The main problem is we are both in relationships. He recently asked me for advice. He asked me what should he do if he is in love with someone who is not his girlfriend. I told him he should do what makes him happy. He said he still loves his girlfriend but he thinks he may be in love with this other girl. I told him to follow his heart. I almost started to think he was talking about me but I don't know. Maybe he doesn't even see me that way. How can I ever know if he loves me back? Am I meant to just suffer in my longing for him?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 October 2009): when it is with your boss steer clear. bosses tend to become bastards after they have their fun. they make your life miserable. in the end you will have to decide whether the few pokings are worth it.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 October 2009): Actually, the Sr. person could have serious damage done to a career, as most companies are put in serious legal risk for a sexual harrasement suite when a superior is sleeping with a jr. staff memeber. We have this in our office, and both were hauled into HR with the managing partner in the room and forced to declair if this was harrasement. When they each (in 2 different meetings) said it wasn't HR pulled out a legal document, which they had 24 hours to sign.Now, everyone knows (she's getting divorced, he's trying not to)- his career is frozen, no promotions... everyone in the office found out, and no one wants to work with her, and in her position she needs work assignments to stay busy, and he's always been the one to provide them, but in this economy he's slow... she's on thin ice... if she's not billable, she could lose her job... opps... fun while it lasted, not so much now...
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A
female
reader, QuirkLady  +, writes (1 October 2009):
 Consider that if you go through with this relationship, if it blows up you will be single and out of a job. Your relationship might violate a human resources policy from the start, and if you break up it's usually the employee fired, not the boss.
I would not make a move until you have switched jobs and both of you have broken up with your respective partners. To go for this relationship in this economy as is is a bad idea.
Good luck.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (30 September 2009):
He's in a relationship and unless he comes out of it, he really isn't worth persuing because you'll get hurt. Take a look at your own relationship as well. If you don't love your boyfriend, it would be cruel to keep him. Set him free to find someone who will love him. Then, unless your boss leave his girlfriend for you, you must start to move on. Go out, meet other guys, take up a hobby that other guys can do and you'll meet a great one. Set your current boyfriend free and find someone else. Don't wait around.
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