A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and I are going to a party on Saturday that his ex may be at. They had a bad break up and I am insecure about her. He knows this. He unfriended her on Facebook when I asked him though. Thing is, he's been checking her profile more regularly on Facebook (can only see her profile pic). Do you think he's mentally preparing himself to see her? I know I shouldn't be snooping by the way!Unfortunately, we had a fight a couple of weeks ago about her and my insecurities surrounding her. He says that my bringing her up so often has made him think about her more. He wasn't thinking of her before her says, not in a long time! So do you think he is looking her up more often in the run up to this party because I've caused this or because he's not over her. I know he's the type to want to show people how well he's done for himself and he does want me to go. But I'm worried I'm making much ado about nothing! :-( thanks for your advice!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2013): DO NOT allow the ex to ruin and be cause of the end of your relationship. You are giving power where it shouldn't be.
BELIEVE that he is happier with you, and BELIEVE you are his one true love. BELIEVE it and act that way.
Be classy and be polite to the ex.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2013): He is correct about you keeping her fresh in his mind. The more you fret and bring her up, the more you force him to relive his past with her. Pressing the issue can backfire.Lighten up on the guy.He unfriended her on Facebook, but he didn't delete her profile. He's working things out in his head and his heart. One of the things you have to do for closure after a breakup; is come to terms with it. He wants her to see he has moved on and up; because now he's with you. Look sexy, be classy, charming, and be confident. Show her he's got the hottest woman in the room. This is going to be tough on him; because she's going to be there with someone else too. You've got to be there for your man, and you've got show her that things are solid.She's got to see total happiness in your face. Your timing couldn't be worse!!! Whatever you do now may look like an act.Now is not the time for your insecurity about her. You should be projecting just the opposite. Her loss is your gain, and you are the most valuable upgrade in his life. Now prove it!!!Please don't fight or cause a scene at that party. That would undermine your own relationship.
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