A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: ok so here's the thing I really need another point of view cos this problem is starting to drive me crazy. I work with this guy he is younger than me by 3 years, we get on really well and are very close and I will admit that I am attracted to him, and I think he likes me too but am not sure...this is where I need your inputHe texts me all the time, when we are together he looks me right in the eye, smiles and finds excuses to touch me (he's particularly fond of giving shoulder massages) he brings me little gifts, and makes me feel very special, he defends and protects me but not in a silly way it's very sweet (by the way we are both in our late 20's so this is not school kid stuff) However a mutual female friend (who denies liking him but I have my suspicions) told me that she thinks he's just a flirt, once she called him gay..??? Anyway he's fantastic with my son but has been getting teased about a "ready made family" by our mutual female friend and recently sent me a message saying "i am a lovely person but..." you can guess the rest Am so confused and don't want to make a fool of myself can I get another perspective please. Does he like me or not?Thanks
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female
reader, Laura1318 +, writes (26 May 2010):
If a man is not interested in you , he will not spend his worth while time with you . He would only talk in monosyllables and only on work related issues.
Just flow with the current.
A
male
reader, C. Grant +, writes (26 May 2010):
Yep, that makes sense. If you're really worried that he believes you're looking for a daddy for your son, staying low key is the way to go. And he may come around on his own to the idea of moving past the friend zone.
Good luck!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYou're probably right there's absolutely no reason for things to change right now I guess I am just feeling a bit frustrated with the situation and her behavior he is a good friend so supportive and caring there's no reason things can't stay the same, I just worry that we will stay in the "friend Zone" but I would rather have him as a friend than not at all...does that make sense?
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A
male
reader, C. Grant +, writes (25 May 2010):
OK, is there a reason you need to do anything right now? Sounds like things are going along OK -- you're enjoying his company and support. I would think that the longer he's around you, the less influence this other woman is likely to have. Is the status quo not an option for some reason?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 May 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your help guys. I know she is toxic the problem is that he is friends with her longer and would have been very close to her up until I came along, he still trusts her and listens to her a lot tho and this is my problem, she has him convinced that I am looking for a dad for my son...which by the way I AM NOT...I feel as if I should let this go because I have a lot of other things on my plate at the moment too, problem is he's so supportive and helpful, thoughtful and very handsome I feel like cutting him out of my life would be a huge loss for both of us (him and me) Could use an objective point of view...what would you do if you were me?
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A
male
reader, C. Grant +, writes (23 May 2010):
Your mutual female friend is toxic. Don't listen to her. Enjoy a promising relationship.
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A
female
reader, confused Wife +, writes (23 May 2010):
I have had something similar happen to me. Your friends is only calling the guy gay so you want be attracted to him. If you think he's gay you wont want him and that would leave room for her to get him. If your friend is not being supportive of your feelings and teasing you. That just means she's not a true friend. Friends don't drag you down they lift you up. I think you should let this guy know how you feel and go from there.
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