A
female
age
41-50,
*rm1024
writes:This is going to be a book...but i will TRY to shorten this as best as possible. I met my ex when I was 15 years old and he was 16. We were each others first everything..first loves, first sexual experiences ect ect. He became a real part of my family..our parents let us have sleep overs for special occasions (in seperate bedrooms of course) like concerts and new years. We went to four proms together, celebrated holidays, went to our families prospective church functions, he even stayed at my place when we went on family vacations to tend to our animals.. we did everything together. In fact, since he graduated a year ahead of me, he got a decent job and after work he would come to my house walk right in the front door up to the bathroom and take a shower..id sit in there and talk to him and then we would plop on the couch side by side and watch tv the rest of the night. We were like a married couple at 17..hence why i broke up with him. I know that sounds awful, but i wanted to have different life experiences before i settled down with that one person. I loved him, and told him I just need to enjoy life and he should too...Id hate to get into our mid 20's, 30's or 40's and have regrets. he did not see eye to eye with me on this so the break up was messy. But we tried to stay friends and I would talk to him about the girls he was dating ect ect. I started dating another guy and since my ex and I were still friends and had feelings for each other we would hook up every now and again...Then one day I broke up with the guy i was dating and tried to start a relationship with my ex...we had sex and then he just blew me off. Both of us started to do and say mean things to each other..it just got messy. Then we stopped talking and I vanished for awhile, got pregnant by an ass and then came back into our circle of friends At this point my ex wouldnt even talk to me. My daughter was born in 2000 and 2001 was probably the last time he and i spoke a word to each other..but that hasnt stopped our paths from crossing. Actually in 2002 two of our mutal friends went to visit with him since he had moved out of town..and with in the first 5 minutes he was asking how i was..in a sarcastic tone...my friends tried to get him to call me, but he made excuses.."I dont date people with kids" "She is living with someone" ect ect, at one point my friend said to him "im going to tell her you still love her" to which my ex replied whatever i dont care..WHO DOES THAT?? The nail in that Wierd coffin was this..as they were getting ready to go to a party my ex told them that if he got drunk and whined about how much he missed me then to smack him and tell him to shut up. WHAT?! I am confused. Not long after that I met my husband..(New years eve 2002 in fact)ironically in the same town that my ex had moved to..and the reason i was in that town?? To find my ex..but I met my husband and he is a wonderful man. Now you would think that would be the end of this story..but it is not. You see my ex has a live in girlfriend of 3 years now, we all have the same friends..amazing isnt it? we moved from a small town to a big city and yet we manage to have the same circle of friends here..so we do see each other on occasion. His sister just moved here and her and i have maintained a close friendship...he has asked his sister, periodically about me. Now this is the basic history. He won't talk to me, yet he asks about me..does he hate me? And none of this would bug me if i didnt still have monthly dreams about him that we were talking, in one dream he even asked me if i felt we made the wrong decisions with our mates, in one he told me he missed me. This angers me...Because as much as i love my husband..there are times that I feel my ex and i were meant to be..hence why our paths continue to cross..and i get angry because I feel like he has said so many things to people that would make me think he still loved me and yet refused to act on them..So am I crazy, does he still love me? Or does he just hate me so much that he asks about me to see if there is something going on in my life that he can laugh about?Again sorry for the length, but its hard to shorten 13 years of history
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female
reader, deejuliet +, writes (30 January 2009):
 People who we once loved always hold a special place in our hearts. They own just a tiny little corner way in the back. You were once very special to each other and so there is the concern, "is she doing well? not doing well?" that is just a curiosity really. It doesnt mean he still loves you in the same sence that he loved you many years ago. It just means he is curious how you are because he ONCE loved you.
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