A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I texted a friend / neighbor and didn't 'sign it.'She replied 'Who is this?' which told me thatshe doesn't have me on her phone contacts.She texts a lot so I don't think it's that she doesn't know how to use her phone, but it's possible that she's just lazy. (I think she's had her current phone for 6+ months...)To me it's kind of weird because she sometimes asks me to do things; for instance, yesterday I drove her kid home.I've known her for over 10 years but usually I e-mail her.Anyway I guess I'm just asking, do you think I'm justified in thinking of her as not much of a friend?Thanks!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (8 June 2014):
 So treat them like they treat you. Casual acquaintances.
A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (8 June 2014):
 So you each are married??
Yes, if she borrows your van and doesn't replace gas, then don't let her borrow it again without asking for the replacing of gas.
Otherwise, she could be acting a bit aloof with her husband nearby in case he's the jealous type.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2014): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionBy lazy I meant that maybe she was too lazy to enter my name into her phone.
She does text my wife quite a bit.
There are other things too. We've had them over for dinner many many times, they've never had us over once. And a while back she and her husband borrowed my van for a couple of days, returned it with less gas than it started with and never even said 'thanks.' Great friends, huh?
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (7 June 2014):
Are you worried that you like her more than she likes you? It's a valid concern, but like Cerberus said, the question over texting shouldn't be the only evidence you use for this.
Why would not recognizing your phone number be considered "lazy"? That seems a bit harsh. What was her response when you answer the "who is this" question?
You email with her, so how does that go? It's possible that she may not be good with phone numbers. I have very few contacts in my phone myself and don't like to text at all.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 June 2014): Based on her not having your number saved when you contact her mainly through email and you sign texts with your name? No, I don't think you're justified thinking that. You're being a tad petty if you ask me.
Some of my closest friends in the world I don't have a number for on my phone but am in almost contact online. I have no need of a phone number for them because I have other ways of contacting them, plus they either lose their phone regularly or hardly use it.
Seriously, OP, friendships don't hinge on whether they have your number saved in their phone.
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