A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I keep worrying about the following,- Never had a long term relationship- Not great dating experience and bad luck in general with dating- Not many chance to meet women when I start working in male dominated industry.Some things I know I can change like meeting women, and approaching them and talking to them (some I have greatly improved whilst I've been at uni).My past (well lack of) is something I'm worried about because although its not something I will only mention once I'm in a comitted relationship, I worry that any girlfriend I have will find that off putting and dump me because they may think I'm weird.I don't see myself as weird socially because I have close friends both male and female and I have had girlfriends before, they just didn't last long and I wanted to enjoy my time at uni without having to worry about making time for a girlfriend. I'm 22 and although still young there seems to be this thing that your odd if you haven't done certain stuff by the time you're 25 (I'm 23 in 1 month then after I graduate from uni I want to backpack round the world so I won't start my career until I'm 25 and when I'll probably look for a girlfriend). However by then many women I worry may find me off putting as my only major flaw is not having had much dating and relationship experience, even though I have no problem socialising and making friends.Am I just worrying over nothing?
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female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (6 August 2010):
I think you're putting too much pressure and too many timelines on yourself. What will happen will happen. You're perfectly normal, I think you are worrying over nothing, and when a nice girl comes along who you want to date long term - you'll know and it'll evolve naturally.
I wouldn't worry too much. Keep socializing and having adventures and enjoy university. Good luck, sweet!! You're going to be just fine in the dating world.
A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (5 August 2010):
Yes, stop worrying right now! Every woman u meet from now on doesnt have to know about ur past as far as Im concerned everytime u meet a woman u have a clean slate in dating history. I just granted u one. No woman really wants to know about ur dating past all she care about is who u are now. However if she is one of those idiots who want to dig up the past then keep it vague " A few relationships during uni but I was there mainly to focus on school" Ur a very mature male, who has his life together and ducks in a row what woman wouldnt want u? Darling u scream marriage material to me. Do note that ur going to backpack around the world and thats an opportunity to meet women right there, get some experience under ur belt. In addition, thats a great conversation starter and ull be a well traveled man and that my dear is impressive. So dont fret, ur future wife is out there, ur just taking sometime to urself then u'll go and find her.
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A
male
reader, BrownWolf +, writes (5 August 2010):
Where is it written that you have to do certain things by this age or that age? Trying to live your life the way other people do, will leave you not knowing who you really are.
Live your life according to you. Learn from your past and plan a better future.
You will find a long term relationship when it's time, and you are ready to settle down.
Until then...Have fun with your life.
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