A
male
age
41-50,
*ingleone
writes:Dear Cupid,I have been seeing this girl for the past 3 months. We have had sex numerous times, she stays over my house, we go to dinners, movies etcYet she says she only sees me as a friend. I really like her, what should I do?
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female
reader, massageismylife +, writes (16 January 2008):
 I agree with uncle phil above me. if you have plans in life to become married with kids one day aand she doesnt see that with you then why hold on to nothing? if you like her like you say you do, all you can do is tell her and hope she feels the same way, but is she doesn't then why hold on? sorry bud!!
A
female
reader, O Connor  +, writes (16 January 2008):
 well to be honest, in my eyes, a friend with benefits is someone that you solely have sex with, nothing else - not dinner, cinema etc. however, she may just want to be friends with you and just enjoy your company. my advice is to tell her how you feel and see if she reciprocates those feelings, if she doesnt, then you should not indulge in anymore sex, or 'dates' - this will only make things harder for you. talk to her, she may feel the same but is too scared to say it!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2008): If she only sees you as a friend there's not a lot you can do, other than tell her you'd like to be more than a friend - which is what I guess you're getting at.
The way you are now doesn't involve any unneccesary costs, like seeting up home together, marriage and possibly divorce - all very expensive.
If you want more than a casual friendship and she doesn't, I'd suggest moving on and finding yourself a woman who wants the same things in life as you do.
Maybe in time this woman will alter her general outlook on your 'relationship' - after all, it's only been going for 3 months which isn't all that much of a length of time in the general scheme of things.
Phil
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