A
female
age
30-35,
*abyminow
writes:HELPHELPHELP!!! ILL TELL YOU THE STORY! AND HOPEFULLY YOULL BE ABLE TO HELP MEokay so me and this guy ..#1.. were going out for three months, but he was to nervous to kiss me or anything, and he was 16! so i broke up with him, because i wanted to date someone who wasnt nervous to be around me, a real man, or at least as real as they can get at our age. then his best friend ..#2.. and i started talking, and i have like him for a really long time,and he has like me as well. like we liked eachother before i even met #1, but my best friend had told me things about #2 i didnt like, like that he moves really fast with girls, and goes after almost every girl he sees. i didnt want to date the player type if ya know what i mean. but lately i havent been able to stop thinking about him, and i think i have fallen harddd for this guy. the thing is, he is way more experienced than i am, and also he always calls me, my darling, like last night, he was like goodnight my darling, and all i said was goodnight, and i think he was upset that i didnt say anything better because its almost 230 and he hasnt texted or called me. he usually does. i dont know what to do, i mean i know he really likes me, because he got really upset when i was dared to kiss some other dude, and me and #2 arent even going steady or anything. but he hasnt said anything to me today!! and also he is the only guy who makes me so nervous when i am around him, and he is always making me blush and stuff, but he also asks questions like.. what would you do if you walked into my room and i was naked, and i nevver know what to say, so i always say idk, and then he just goes no really what! and then gets dissappointed if i dont say anything! please help me with this kinda stuff, i think i might be way over my head, but i really want to be with him, if that makes sense! thank you!!!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Phsyciatrist-to-be  +, writes (23 August 2009):
 Ok, so it sounds like #1 is out of the picture for now. Let's focus on #2.
You know he likes you, and you know you like him. And to me it sounds like those feelings are strong on both sides. I would normally suggest you ask him out: it doesn't sound like he'd say no.
But then we have your other concern: you think he could be the Player-type. What you should consider here, is not what other people have told you, but what you have seen with your own eyes. Have you seen him pursuing other girls, or messing around with them in the way he messes around with you? If the answer is yes, then he may well be a bit of a player, and his feeling may not be what you think they are.
If the answer is no, you HAVEN'T seen him acting like he does with you with other girls, then it could well be that his feelings are genuine: he really likes you, and only you.
I can't tell you exactly what you should do, but I can guide you to the best decision. Use your own judgement: think about him as a person, and decide for yourself if you think he's the right person for you.
If he messes with other girls too, then I'm afraid that it might not be in your best interests to ask him out.
But if YOU are the sole object of his attention, then go for it!
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