A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have 2 problems. In my gym class i have boys that like to pick on people. They don't mean it but they play to much. Its this boys who hits on me constantly real hard and i let it slide and ignore him but he will keep doing it. I'm a person who doesn't like to play fight, real fight and even pass play hits but i see i will have to, to get them to leave me alone. I try to ignore them but they just provoke people. I teacher gets on to them but they do it on the slide. The boy who constantly hits on me pisses me off so bad but i hold it in because im not messing up my record for him. I don't know what to do when i go back to school tomorrow i plan on just defending myself so they'll maybe leave me alone but they might not. See im quiet i don't say much at all so they sometimes play and pick with me so i let it ride but i not gonna keep getting pushed like the way they do me i gonna have to stop being quiet so they will back off. But he and others don't pick with the big boys during class they mess with the quiet ones.....My 2nd problem is im quiet during gym class i have no friends in their so i just stay quiet but it makes me seem weired because i don't play or say much and im to shy to speak up but all the boys in their aren't my friend they just like to talk about people and mess with them its so childish today they got a quiet boy who doesn't do anything sent to the office because he was being picked with and he defended himself and he got in trouble, and thats why i try to avoid them because im not trying to get in trouble but i feel that i need to defend myself.Just like today i was sitting down mining my own business watching down play football and 2 boys thought it was funny to come over there and pass gas in my face i told them to stop but they kept doing it thanking it was funny, i just let it ride but i was mad as hell and wanted to fight them.....then on own our way to class the boys who hits on me started talking bad to me and just kept mugging me but i let it ride because if i fight i fight and im going at it but im doing good in conduct i don't wanna mess it up but they make me mad i wish they'll just leave me alone i don't bother anybody and the and i don't like telling the teacher because they'll bother me more for doing that thats what happen to the quiet boy who had gotten sent to the office they picked on him and he got mad, starting tomorrow i gonna start speaking up and defending myself because it makes me mad ass hell and makes me seem like a punk to myslef and everybody else, im just gonna have to fightHOW CAN I MAKE IT IN HERE
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male
reader, Snoopy99  +, writes (30 September 2009):
The honest answer to this is...yes!
Like most civilised people, I don't advocate violence. It's the last resort in any situation. However, if you're being picked on, it's a good way of establishing barriers.
If it's any consolation, in a few years' time, when you have to start dealing with bills, rent and the whole daily grind, the rubbish you're going through now will seem irrelevant...trust me :)
All bullies are cowards, they go for easy targets who don't bite back. If the people they picked on actually hit back - and thereby made their sad daily rituals a bit CHALLENGING -do you honestly think they'd continue? Of course not.
So, respect yourself and your own space, and don't be afraid to hit back. Even if you're not the best fighter in the world (and I'll bet $$$$ they're not either), the sheer act of standing up to these cowards will throw them into a state of deep confusion.
Stand up for yourself! Good luck with it. Trust me, bullies hate their own medicine being spooned back to them. And, sure enough, when you do so, you'll find the problem disappears,as if by magic...
A
female
reader, HereAreMyTwoCents +, writes (30 September 2009):
 Ok, so if these boys are going to be mean to you no matter what, you need to at least be participating in the physical activity with them, even so. That's the first thing you need to do. Is get off your butt, don't sit around on the bleachers, if for no other reason, becuase your grade depends on it. But it's not just that, the more off to yourself you are the more they see you as good prey, so by joining in the scheduled activity, you are also standing up for yourself. If one of them tries to push you forcibly out of the activity area or does something very visibly unkosher to you, hopeful the gym teacher will notice that and interject, but even if the teacher doesn't, you cannot back down from participating in the activity, no matter what, no matter what NO MATTER WHAT. If nothing esle, you should remember that it is your human right to your own public education as a citizen of your country, and you CANNOT let them think that they have that much power over you that they can actually keep you from even participating in the regularly scheduled activity that is taking place irrespective of cliquish stupidities. Just remember, STOP not participating in the class. You must STOP doing this at all costs. This is not helping you at all, and it is hurting you a lot. It is hurting your grades and your self esteem, and quite plainly it is just no way to go through life, not participating. And even if they try to exclude you, you must not back down, get back in the ongoing game/activity everytime no matter how forcibly they try to evict you from it, to let them know that even if you will never be friends, even if you will always be enemies, you will not take their bull anymore. And if the rest of the term has to pass in this manner, then so be it, but at least in this way you walk away from this stupid school year with your head held high, very high. Cause that's all this is, just a stupid class out of stupid school year, and then they'll be out of your life, and you can move on to more decent peopole and environments.
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