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Am I gay or not? I really need an answer.

Tagged as: Big Questions, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (10 February 2009) 7 Answers - (Newest, 29 March 2010)
A male Czech Republic age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I am 14 years old and I wanted to ask a question as I think I could be gay because I get on when I think of a mans penis. I was thinking about it for a one and a half years. But I don't get on when I think of women, I get a nice feelings but not an erection (sometimes I do but not too much let's say 1/20 thoughts ).

I realy want to have an relationship with a woman and have a nice marriage but the point is that I think I am gay, when I get an erection when I think of a man but when I think of a woman I don't. Another thing is I love women but I am scared that I would be gay. And is there a way I wouldn't be gay? I will try everything. Plus I read a lot that a boy goes through stages so I want to know how long is a normal time to think of guys and to what age is it normal

I would be glad if no one will post that being gay is normal, I know that I won't accept that, I would be disgusted when I think I should have a gay marriage or even a boyfriend, I won't accept that. thank you again.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (29 March 2010):

I think you are to young, don't worry about it now. If however these feelings carry on later then maybe ask this question again saying you're 18 or whatever.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (10 February 2009):

you could be bi or gay you are young you dont know yet, it could be that you are physcially and sexually attracted to men but emotionally attracted to women.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (10 February 2009):

I know this isn't what you want to hear necessarily, but it really doesn't matter!!!! You're 14, loads of people just go through phases, and some people end up gay, some don't. Sexuality is more fluid than people like to think. The point is that this is clearly troubling you, and it really shouldn't be. Try not to worry about it, it doesn't matter either way. You might be bi, straight, gay - who knows - who cares?! Good luck :-) xx

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A female reader, heartbroken . x United Kingdom +, writes (10 February 2009):

Short and sweet answer.

You might be bi

xx

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A male reader, Leonardo Indonesia +, writes (10 February 2009):

I can only tell you this.. heterosexual men are totally turned off by the thought of touching, looking at, or even thinking about another man's penis. Yuck. You are pretty young, so it is impossible to give you a final answer. You'll just have to wait and see what happens as you get older.

If kissing and feeling a woman's breasts don't give you a massive hard-on at age 18.... well, then you know you aren't 100% straight.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (10 February 2009):

You are 'coming of age' and feeling sexual sensations. It can be confusing, but it's ok to appreciate the male body because you are male. I'm a woman, but when I was younger, if I saw a naked woman (or bra pictures) I went all nervous... but I actually was in 'wonder' of my own body and how sexual it will be.

At your age, erections are spontaneous, and normal. Is there a trusted family man that can help you understand?

Someday when you meet a woman and fall in love, your body will naturally respond to her. It is nothing to worry about. (also porn is no good for normal sexual development) Be well!

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A female reader, Annieapple United Kingdom +, writes (10 February 2009):

A lot of straight guys have crushes on men as they go through puberty. At your age you can’t be sure. However, if you are gay there isn’t anything you can do about it. Unfortunately you will just have to live with it. Do you have feelings or crushes for any specific guys?

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