A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:i'm 23 and i'm really confused about my sexuality and have been questioning it for many years now, i used to find women very attractive and i even had a girlfriend once but i ended it because it felt awkward and there was no more feelings after the initial attraction which also went away. I have for years now found myself fantasizing about men and masturbating while thinking of men, sometimes i even dream about them, a few years ago i kissed a friend of mine in a dare but i enjoyed it and i wanted to do more. I have searched the internet for answers but i have found them unsatisfactory as they tell me to wait and find out or look into my feelings but i am so confused that i really don't know any more, i'm not sure if i still like women because even though i find one to be good looking, i'm not that attracted to them, its a duller feeling than it used to be.
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male
reader, AvgGuy1  +, writes (23 August 2011):
 Google the 'Kinsey Scale'.
Basically, it's a scale based on a study of human sexuality (mostly men) which essentially attempts to classify people into categories ranging from 0 (totaly straight) to 6 (exclusively homosexual).
I myself, am gay at about a 5 on the Kinsey scale. I find women attractive purely from an aesthetic perspective but I'm not attracted to them physically at all (any more). Like you, when I was in high school, I had girl friends as well. Although I never did anything sexually with them. Later on in life, after I'd gotten out of college - just at about your age - I finally 'came out' to myself as I, like you, had been having these feelings of being both physically and emotionally attracted to guys.
At your age, you're past the hormonal stage where you just wanna boff anything that moves so if you think/feel that you're gay... you probably are. If you still feel attracted to women it's possible that you're bi-sexual; and there's nothing wrong with that.
The thing is... to actually ACCEPT YOURSELF and then you can move on to 'coming out' to others - which in and of itself is difficult but VERY worth it.
A
female
reader, Ima FreAk! +, writes (22 August 2011):
 Hiyaaaa,Well I think that you could of been in a bad relationship which made you feel dull with women relationship (please correct me if I'm wrong).Nothing wrong with having feelings with the opposite sex but to make sure that you know what orientation you are it's best if you experiment. Try being in a male relationship and female relationship so that you can honestly judge if your either like on sex or your bisexual.Honestly just experiment just go out with a gay guy and see if you like it and if you do then you can say that you could be gay but if you fantasize about women while in you're in a gay relationship then you might be bi. Just go with different sex and then you'll be able to say.Patience is virtue and don't rush yourself in a relationship it doesn't matter how long it takes till to find out what you are so long as your happy that's all it matters.Hope my advice helps!Good luck!Lots of love,Ima FreAk!x
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