A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:Am I depressed?My partner invited me to meet him, halfway through a work trip abroad, where i spent a weekend with him, but he spent most the time with his work colleagues with me tagging along (that's how i felt) and he bullied a female colleague into staying in our company.When i got home and he was still away with them i started to feel insecure. i rang his cell phone but more often than not he didn't answer - which made me feel worst.He is now home, but saying i need to pick myself up and i am depressed, (due to feeling insecure).He has just told me he is going to be away again for a few days very soon. I am trying not to get those panicky feelings of jealousy.I know a few months ago, because he felt i was depressed, he had a bit of a fling with another woman.He says he did it as I was bringing him down and I am going to do it again if i don't stop feeling insecure and needy.Am i depressed? i go to work, cook, clean, wash myself etc....so don't feel depressed - but he says i am...and i am making his work life difficult by not just going with the flow, but being "needy"sorry to ramble on,...
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male
reader, lupa-k  +, writes (26 April 2007):
I think he's saying that you are depressed to try to maintain some kind of hold over you. He's even used it as an excuse to cheat on you, and using such a label upon you no doubt makes you feel worse, and in some way like you are indebted to him for sticking with you.
I don't think you are depressed, just guilty of catering for the every whim of someone who has no respect whatsoever for you as a person. You don't need this man at all, he's a cruel control freak and you can do so much better
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 April 2007): i think you need a new man sweetheart no one can blame any one for them cheating ok so what hes post to stand by you and help you pick your self up so i think you should do this get rid of him and it may make your depression worse but as you slowly heal the pain you'll be back to your same old self and be ready to find some one who really cares i think him putting you down in everything may have made you very sad n depressed but in time ull get thru this keep your head high and leave that man before it gets worse and its too late once a cheater always a cheater but the thing about him is hes blaming you for doin it that makes him an ass and you do not need that your to nice loving caring and beautiful do do that and put your self down for this man stand up for your self and leave him
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A
female
reader, Pork Hock +, writes (26 April 2007):
He is making your life miserable. You aren't a robot! You can't just switch on and off for his convenience and how convenient for him to give you a label for something he clearly doesn't understand. You aren't depressed, you are being bullied by him. He is a control freak and you need to get away from ASAP, maybe when he is on one of his trips.
Do you want to end up as the girlfriend who is dusted off at the Christmas party every year and no one sees you during the rest of the year. Do you want all these women who is messing about with coming up to you speaking to you once a year. You are a human being, he is behaving like an insecure moron and he is controlling you even from afar.
Move out, get out or do whatever you can to get out of this relationship. He is a cruel person and you don't have to have him wipe your feet on you. Ask yourself if you could ever do this to another person, the way he treats you, I am sure not, so you don't have to put up with behaviour you know is not right, respectful of you or mature.
Let me know how you get on.
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