A
male
age
30-35,
*onsultingCam
writes: I'm a guy who has historically had more female friends than male, I feel recently however I may be misreading a friends intentions when they ask to go on walks at night together and stuff of that nature.We see each other a lot as we share a house together but recently have done more things just the two of us, we talk about a whole heap of stuff including for the first time past relationships, and recently feel the way she acts around me is naturally (perhaps unintentionally) a bit flirtatious.I do find her attractive but only recently feel signals as it were and not sure if I should test the perverbial "friendzone" and possibly ruin a great friendship.Any thoughts/experiences of that nature and advice would be greatfully received.
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male
reader, ConsultingCam +, writes (28 March 2015):
ConsultingCam is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you both for your advice I think I must be going mad, as you say she may see me as a non-threat so can open up to me which would explain a lot. I do feel the 'brother' label is probably more appropriate considering the circumstances and manner towards me, and the timing of such feelings are a little odd due to some personal circumstances at the moment. It's helped alot hearing your opinions so thank you for your time.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 March 2015): It could be that you're in the 'friend zone'. It could be that she sees you as more than that. Altogether as an alternative, she could think of you as a brother.
What you need to do is be more assertive. More direct. Subtle in your nuances, but showing that you're interested. Don't go trumpeting it around, but rather let her come to you. If she responds well, then you have your answer. If not, it could be: a) she's not ready yet, or b) you're just a friend and little else.
Either way, be sure to know when to walk away. Yes, you may ruin a good friendship. But if you play it right, you won't lose everything. But it is something you need to take action with and show your interest soon so that she knows that you feel the same way too.
Good luck.
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A
female
reader, Dapril09 +, writes (27 March 2015):
If you are already spending time together alone, why not ask her to the movies or dinner? You dont have to call it a date but her behavior should be self explanatory. Its hard to answer because it all has to do with her behavior with you compared to everyone else. Maybe she just thinks of you as someone who she trusts enough to vent to or just relax with. On the other hand maybe the time youve been spending alone has awakened romantic feelings towards you. Best thing to do is to clear things up and be prepared for any answer she gives you whether she wants to be strictly friends or has a crush on you, its better to know so you can move forward with whatever relationship you have with your friend.
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