A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm an 18 year-old male who has always identified as straight, but have now realised that I am definitely not an normal straight guy... I think it's important that I never had any sexual experiences apart from kissing a few girls, and the usual horseplay with mates.Over the past few months I've developed strong feelings for a guy who has become my best mate, I know he's not even that attractive, but for some reason I get extremely physically aroused at any thought of closeness with him, sometimes not even physical closeness. I've accepted that I'm in love with him, even though he's straight and has no idea.I know it's unhealthy and I have to move on, but I'm not sure where to go from here... I kind of think I might be gay, but I'm not sure any more. It's difficult and feels wrong for me to think of myself in a relationship with another man and can't see myself being physical in any way with a man either. I find it much easier to visualise kissing girls, and when I'm out at night I always notice how good they look, more than i notice the guys. I think I'm attracted to girls but I don't really know either.The only thing I've been able to do to try and figure myself out is watch porn. I have tried gay porn, and though I do find anal sex disgusting, I do find some of it arousing, in particular straight guy fantasies, wrestling and horseplay. Obviously I've also tried straight porn, and though I am more turned on sometimes than others, can ejaculate to lesbians and when focused on the woman in normal sex. None of that comes anywhere close to the attraction I feel for this guy though.I've never felt that way about anyone before, and so I'm unsure what that means about my sexuality, I am also extremely close to a very beautiful girl, emotionally at least, I love her to pieces. But while the intense physical feeling I get for my mate isn't there with her, I do think I find her attractive, and recently have been feeling a twinge, maybe even a little rush of blood, down there every time I feel close to her or hug her. I really want to have physical feelings for this girl as I feel we are soulmates, and if my body allows me to, I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I can't risk hurting her or losing her so nothing can happen until I figure myself out for sure. Does anyone think I'll be able to develop my feelings and love her the way I want to? Am I bi? or am I gay and in denial?
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 April 2009): You know, my gut feeling on you is that you may be bi sexual. I am a straight woman so I don't know much about all the bi or gay stuff but after reading what you wrote, seems pretty simple. You are what you feel you are. If you are attracted to him, then you are. Doesnt really matter what title you put on yourself does it??
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 April 2009): You know, my gut feeling on you is that you may be bi sexual. I am a straight woman so I don't know much about all the bi or gay stuff but after reading what you wrote, seems pretty simple. You are what you feel you are. If you are attracted to him, then you are. Doesnt really matter what title you put on yourself does it??
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 April 2009): .hey Im a 21 year old male..you like masturbating to women and you also believe you are in love with a good friend of yours who is a guy...the first thing you have to do is try and determin if your love for him is actually love and not lust...ive made that mistake before.. Its very important that you figure that out..and also if you are attracted both men and women and fantisize about having sex with both.. I believe that would be considered as bisexual....i started fooling around with guys and girls at a young age and i was confused for a while but i found out that i just liked giving men oral. I couldnt do the whole guy guy kissing thing...Anal is good though.(ive only given). But i love the female body and structure, so If any of this sounds like it could fit for you..then i would say you are bi not gay. And shemale porn might catch your eye..look up www.tube8.com go to search and type in Vanity. Or just scroll the catagories. If have any more questions for me personally i do have and account. Imtaylor78
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A
male
reader, Stupidandlost +, writes (21 April 2009):
Hi dude.
The first thing that "lept" from your question was " I know it's unhealthy". Well hello! There is no such thing as an "unhealthy" or a "healthy" sexuality. There is only your sexuality.
You are at an age where, as far as your sexuality is concerned, it is all "up for grabs" as they say. It's entirely normal for you to be attracted, in some way, to another man. As normal, whatever that may be, to being attracted to a woman.
Try not to straightjacket your sexual feelings. Do what feels right. Trust yourself and your feelings. Whichever way this leads you will be the right way.
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