A
male
age
30-35,
*rusie
writes:Hello all, I just did a post about this girl I had a 3 week thing with going back to college in a different state for the next semester. I'm handling it well (I think), trying not to care and not being clingy or anything. The bummer is that I still like her (I tend to hold on to girls I like), and get real pissed at the thought of her meeting older, more attractive, and simply better guys than me. She's a cute girl and way cool, so I know this is an inevitability. Regardless, it makes me mad, jealous, and slightly self conscious. My questions here are: am I being too much of a wuss? Is that just the way it is with girls in college (always meeting and hooking up with guys)? Are these guys really good enough to make me feel like I'm less than they are?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 January 2012): "am I being too much of a wuss?" Nope, you can't help how you feel and you're not doing anything wussy. You can't exactly switch off your feelings at the touch of a button you know and actually not acting on those feelings and moving on takes strength and willpower.
"Is that just the way it is with girls in college (always meeting and hooking up with guys)?" Not really, some girls definitely but most I know would gladly settle for one good guy over lots of them, in fact most are hoping the guys they get with are that guy but when they realize he's not they move on to the next one and the pattern repeats itself.
"Are these guys really good enough to make me feel like I'm less than they are?" Nobody is that good, seriously. If there's one thing in life I have learned in my 30+ years on this planet it's to never think of yourself in comparison to others. There will always be someone who is better than you at certain things, Brad Pitt and George Clooney will always be hotter than me and probably always have more money than me too. Thierry Henry will always be a better soccer player, Beyonce will always be a better singer, I could list a million people that have a million things in my day to day life that have traits that are better than mine in comparison but what's the point in being jealous? It serves me no purpose to get down about things like, instead I prefer to focus on my own life, my own great qualities, improving those and working on my flaws.
The issue you're having is one of circumstance OP, not of you as a person. You had a 3 week fling, it was fun, she was nice but it was never going to last because 3 weeks is not enough time to form a close bond and then she had to go back to a different state. It's nothing to do with you, her or other guys it just was never feasible to build a relationship with her. So just move on.
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