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male
,
anonymous
writes: Why can't I keep a girlfriend? I'm an attractive and very outgoing guy who is very carefree in relationships but I am unable to keep a girlfriend for a significant amount of time. A serious and successful relationship is the one thing I am looking for that I seem unable to find. I'm 25 years old and my longest relationship lasted for one year back in high school. All 3 of my "long" relationships have resulted in me being dumped. Once I get the girlfriend I usually approach the relationship with the idea that she needs to be happy before me, maybe that makes me a wuss? The last 2 ex-girlfriends have come back to me, but only to repeat the same story. I have had plenty of opportunities to begin relationships with other girls but for some reason I don't follow thru with things. I think I might be too picky. For some reason the girls I tried to date seriously were always rich and stuck up, but that's besides the point. My question is am I doing something wrong or is it my attitude or something else? Because I do not want to spend the rest of my life being extremely selective and then being dumped by the girls I go after.
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female
reader, lizabeth +, writes (5 January 2006):
hi, its nothing that your doing in these relationships. but im going to be honest some girls don't like really laid back outgoing guys and thts what it seems like you are but everybodies different. you put your girlfriends happiness before yours though and that makes you an amazing person. and it doesn't make you a wuss in the slightest, it makes you appear a stronger person. your just going for the wrong girls. and i promise that serious long relationship will happen when you least expect it, don't waste your life waiting for it. just enjoy single life now and when that special someone comes along you'll know that shes what you've been waiting for and she won't be stuck up. she'll love you for you.
A
female
reader, happytochat  +, writes (4 January 2006):
From what you have said, to me, you seem to have the right attitude to make a succesful and long-term relationship! and thats good, yet however, unfortunatly, it takes more then one person to get it working.
Try not to stress to much, you are doing everything in your power and in what you know. You said basicly all the gilrs you have gone out with are stuck up and rich, I think thats your answer there! You are going for the wrong girls who DON'T do well in relationships and who DON'T appricate the great kind of guy you are, and you truly are, I can tell.
I think you have to rethink the type of girls you generally go for, and think about what you want in a relationship. You want commitment obviously, trust, loyalty, love- those are all things that should be two way, not just you giving them to her!
So perhaps look for a girl that will give you that, as one who wants to love you, will stay with you.
Perhaps those ex gf's just didn't want to be in a serious relationship, either way, you sound to good for them! Try not to stress about it to much, heaps of people of all different ages, younger and older then you, go through what you are right now and feel exactly the same way, it jsut takes time, and one day, you will meet someone who you can have a truly love and long term relationship with!
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