A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Since moving out on my own nearly 2 years ago I've become friends with a lot of guys. It starts off as just hanging out, and then when it seems like either I or they start to have more feelings they find another girl. In a recent friendship, I had known this guy for close to a year, and he was well aware I had feelings for him, and even asked me to hang out more often after that. But right as it hit that crutial point (in my mind) he turned around and got involved with another girl. This happens way too often to just be a coincidence, is it something I'm doing wrong? It's not like I try to hide the fact that I'm interested in a guy, but how do I get out of this 'friend zone'? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Odds +, writes (7 October 2011):
 There's a lot of pressure on guys - not only are we expected to make the first move, but if we make it and it goes badly it can screw up a friendship. Personally, I have avoided this by always asking girls out before I got to know them.
Either make the first move or, if you are unwilling to do that, you can take the lower-risk, lower-reward option of making your interest as blatant as possible as soon as you start feeling for a guy. Get him alone. Make eye contact and hold it even after it feels awkward. Hold his hand or his arm. Anything to make it painfully clear that he will not be shot down if he makes the attempt. And do it as soon as you start feeling something; if you wait, he will look elsewhere.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (7 October 2011):
 It is not about hiding the fact that you are interested. You just need to be more up front. Society think that it is up to the guy to make the first move but in my opinion that is just sexist. Therefore take charge of your own life and stop letting opportunities slip by you. If you like a guy well then tell him straight out and ask him would he like to go on a date ect. In order to make things happen in your life you need to take the lead.
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