A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: My ex boyfriend and i have been going at it for quite sometime. We dated in 07, and broke up seven months later. We been trying to work things out ever since. Its been on and off over and over again. Sometimes i feel like its not worth the time to be fussing and fighting with him to make it work cause he's so hard headed. But when it does work out, it feels like its all worth fighting for. He has his moments of expressing himself but he tends to hide it behind his shell because he's afraid to get hurt again. So the problem is, he works all day everyday, literally ! And i had school. There are days where he wants to see me so i go see him at his work place. I even drop what im doing at the moment just to be with him to show that im comitted to making it work out. Sometimes, i cant go see him because im caught up doing my own thing that he gets upset and starts complaining that im never there or i dont do anything for him.(To add in, we have a trusting issue that i have to regain back) i tried to show him that im always there when needed. I've done a lot for him, he tells me he sees it but then later he flips out and all of a sudden doesn't understand anything. That's not even half the story but what im trying to say is, he recently said its completely done. That he's done trying. Im fed up with it and i feel like giving up too. I know what u guys are probably thinking, yes just let it go. But my feelings in my guts are never wrong. And i have this huge feeling that some day or some how, its going to work out. I've given it time and i still am. There are times where he admits he misses me and what not. But im just confused, everyone who knows the situation tells me, u guys aren't gonna work out now but later on in the line, u guys will. I know the love never died out, its still there. what should i do?
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male
reader, Stephen Stewart Nixon +, writes (27 June 2009):
You are swimming in shark invested waters. It sounds like you are trying to make it work all on your own; it takes two. If he is not responding to your efforts his actions should be telling you something; "he is not interested enough to make the effort. Is that what you want for the rest of your life. Surely you deserve a relationship which makes you happy. I'm not saying point blank give up but you do have to realise that you are potentially setting yourself up for a lot of pain. Consider moving on; it will be painful but short compared to years of being with someone who doesn't care. I hope this helps clarify your thoughts.
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