A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: First things first. I'm in a relationship of almost eight months with a man I love dearly. I really think he's a catch and I can see myself in the future with him, and he thinks likewise of me.I also have basically no female friends. This only bothers me occasionally, since I really prefer the company of men to women - not because I get attention from them, but because I find guys more relatable than girls. The thing about this is that most of my guy friends are mutual friends of my boyfriend (and who in fact introduced me to him). At the time I met all of them, my boyfriend was the only one single. Now all the rest of my guy friends are single and looking.I've noticed, recently, that I get a lot of attention from them - more so than I ever used to get. It's nothing overt, and my boyfriend has never expressed jealousy or thought that I would cheat (and I won't), but little things. Things that you pick up on when someone's flirting with you, like the covert staring or finding excuses to touch you (again, not suggestively). The most obvious it's ever been is when we were all talking one day about what would happen if we were stranded on a desert island, and the general consensus from my guy friends was that they would gradually kill and eat each other, and whoever was left could have me "to repopulate the earth". Yikes.I like all these guys - like I said, they're all fairly close friends of mine and of my boyfriend, and I don't really mind getting the attention and the flirting. I'm just worried that this could escalate. What should I do?
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male
reader, redsoxfan99 +, writes (21 September 2009):
Alright, first things first, I am in your boyfriends situation almost exactly. I have a girlfriend whom I dearly love, and she loves me. We both see each other going places. I normally am very protective, but for some reason I have so much trust in her that I am not very jealous/overprotective as I have been in the past with ex's. She is different, and this is why we are doing so well. However, speaking for your boyfriend (in general, every guy is different), he probably is a tad bit jealous if he sees his friends flirting with you, even if you don't give them the time of day. It's the male instinct. Here's what you should do; try to keep the hanging out with your "guy friends" when your boy friend is not there to a minimum. Make sure you let him know that you're okay, and that nothing is going on. Just that reassurance if he asks. I'm a guy, and this would be great if my girlfriend would do this... in front of all your guy friends just make out with your boyfriend for them to all see. Best of luck.
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