A
male
age
30-35,
*mit thakur
writes: many people are sad because they dont have a girlfriend. i am too but my problem is far too serious than that. i am 25 and i never had a girlfriend for which i am sad but also i know that i will meet someone special one day but my problem is that i cant put my mind off from this topic of not having someone. i go to office everyday and i work really hard and i enjoy it. i even work night shifts so as to keep my mind busy and not think too much about it but its like my heart only wants a girl or any relationship and no matter how busy i keep myself this thought eventually comes in my mind and this situation has gotten worsei have became possesive , gotten more temper and everytime i met a girl i start trying like a looser to make her be my girlfriend and it make them uneasy too.i respect women and i know i should not do this to them and i feel terribe about it but its like my mind is not in my control. now a days situation has gotten more worse. every second i wake up and the second i go to sleep, only thing keeps coming in my mind is not having a girl in my life and its not like its interfering with my work but i never had any interest in anything anyway. i had tried everything to not think about this..i dont know what else to do
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 May 2015): unfortuneately, being needy, desperate is much worse if you are a guy.
A
female
reader, sugarplum786 +, writes (27 August 2014):
Stop obsessing about getting a GF and try first to be sociable and make friends. You will come off being desperate and unattractive if you continue in this manner. Back off and try having a social life. Have lots of friends and be happy and easy going. THis will alone attract girls to you without you having to chase after a GF.
You also need to start attending social function and try to enjoy life. Learn to love and live with yourself before inviting someone into your life.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2014): You are too hellbent on the "idea" of having a girlfriend. You are bypassing the part where you meet someone who has the same feelings as you have. You think in the "possessive" sense; like owning a piece of property. No woman is going to subject herself to a relationship of that nature.
You're behaving like a guy who wants a girlfriend; but any girl will do. That isn't very mature or reasonable thinking.
They want you to actually feel affection for them, not just obsessed on the thought of having a partner to call your girlfriend. Pressuring them because of your anxiety, and eagerness to force them into having a relationship with you; which doesn't even include real romantic feelings. Just assigning her the task of keeping you company and calling herself your girlfriend.
Continue going about your life and just be polite and friendly toward women. Don't allow your eagerness to get the better of you. Relax. You must learn to meditate and gain poise. Yoga would be perfect for you. You would be able to give yourself a way to center your soul and relax your spirit. Then things will fall into place.
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