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female
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*opCathryn
writes: I recently dated a guy who seems quite up and down in his emotions. Despite us splitting up (his choice, and quite out of the blue!) I have good reason to believe he still has feelings for me, but he won't discuss it. In my infuriation I over-texted him, getting to the stage of being ridiculous - and very out of character for me! This weekend I sent a truly awful text which, although it was true, I regret sending! I feel I owe him an apology but know he won't answer the phone and has ignored a text I sent since. Also, I feel I am owed an apology from him!! I thought I might pop round to his place with a small gift to say "sorry" and to clear the air so we can at least be friends...I think a relationship might be out of the window now!! What do you think?
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female
reader, TopCathryn +, writes (31 August 2005):
Thanks for your advice - in fact I have already gone round to his house armed with attractive plant for his patio and the words "I am sorry". I rang the bell, he opened the door wide and as I walked in kissed me on the cheek. A brew and an everyday chat later, I decided to quit while I was ahead and leave without discussing any of the heavy stuff - I figured he'd be in touch if he wanted to. Then I left him to it. I feel 1000% better for clearing the air, i know my conscience is clear. He said "great to see you" as I left. Maybe we will see each other again, maybe not - that's his call. But I am so glad I went to his house and followed my own gut instinct.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 August 2005): Dear, you got dumped and he knows you're upset for being dumped. If he won't give you a plausible reason as to why he dumped you, then let it go. Why even be friends with him? Strike this up as a loss and move on. It's highly likely you won't get a response, now after all this ridiculous (your word) texting. If he wanted to pursue a friendship with you, he would've answered your texts at some point. It seems your frustration is getting the better of you and you aren't thinking rationally. Leave this bad situation with your self-pride intact and call it a day. Just move on to a happier, more positive place in your life and quit wasting your energy in trying to get this guy to notice you. He may be playing a game with you and who wants to be with a man like that anyways!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2005): If you really feel as though you should apologise for the text message then maybe it would be a good idea to do so. If he's ignoring you though, it probably wouldn't be wise to go round to his. I think he probably just needs a bit of a break. After all, you said his emotions seem quite mixed up so maybe he needs time to think about things. Perhaps this was his reason for splitting up with you. If he still has feelings for you then he should be fine about talking about things with you and trying to work things out when he's had some time alone.
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A
female
reader, abbylove +, writes (30 August 2005):
if this guy is worthhaving as a friend he will forgive u for the txt you sent, a true friend forgives almost anything. You say his emotions are always up and down maybe if you just give him a little space he will come to you and forgive you anyway. it sounds to me as though he is plying games with you as u say he dumped u out of the blue. if this is the case he isnt worth the bother. sounds harsh but is reality.
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