A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I met a guy about a month ago at a club in my hometown and we really hit it off. I liked him, but he was way more into me than I was into him. Since he lives about 6 hours away, we would mostly text/im each other. He came down again to my hometown about two weeks after we met and then 2 weeks later, my girlfriends and I visited his area and I spent a lot of time with him. Everything was great and we had a lot of fun together (me, him, his friend and my girlfriends). I even met his mother and sister and had dinner with them and he also told me that his mom liked me.Everything was going fine until about a week ago when one of my friends posted on my facebook about my trip and if I met his mom. He also commented on it. I personally don't like the world knowing my dating life like that, especially so early in a potential relationship, so I deleted the post... Now I don't know if this really bothered him or if it was something else entirely but...He stopped staying all the sweet things he used to and he started being really "busy"... Which sucked cause I was starting to really like him... So finally yesterday I asked him when he was done work and told him when I would call. He AGREED. And then didn't pick up... Or call back. Or text back. Today I texted him to ask what happened and his excuse was that he was throwing a party and he was probably wasted in the pool and didn't have his phone with him. 1. It was only 10pm... and he said it got off work at 9... 2. I specifically told him the time I would call. Wouldn't a normal person keep their phone with them or something?I'm really confused. His personality did a 180. He went from being this sweet guy who really liked me to a douchebag who doesn't even seem to have the decency to break things off, if that is even what he wants... What can I do to get a straight answer from him? All I want to know is if he's still interested but something's up (i.e. being mad about the facebook thing/got some lame advice from his friends to play hard to get) or if he's not interested anymore, I would just really appreciate it if he would just tell me.
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 July 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionUpdate: So after that whole not calling because he was drunk in a pool, we texted a bit back and forth the next day and I asked him to call me after work on Saturday night. He didn't text back or call.
Around 1:30am I was out with my friends and drunk (yes, this story is already going downhill) and I decided to just call him. He didn't pick up (again) so being drunk and really bummed out about this whole thing, I sent him a txt saying something like "You don't seem to want to talk anymore so I'm sorry for bothering you. I guess it was my fault for really liking you". And surprise, surprise, no response.
I called him again today at 2pm-ish not expecting a response. He was at work but miraculously, actually picked up. Right away I asked him if something was up and if he really wanted me to not talk to him. According to him, no, nothing was up and he did still want to talk. I asked him multiple times and each time, it was the same answer. He said he was just really busy this week... I really didn't know what to say to him flat out denying that anything was wrong so I let it go. We had a normal conversation after that and he asked if I wanted him to text me after work, so I said sure... though, of course he hasn't. Not surprised. My expectations are pretty low right now. Unfortunately I like the guy I met and knew until about a week ago too much that I'm just kind of hoping this is a weird phase...
A
female
reader, Oregongrl1  +, writes (18 July 2010):
You shouldn't have to beg for a straight answer! maybe it's your red flag. get out while the hearts not effected? and as far as your friends have you always been open w/ one another. they proably didn't think they have done anything wrong? and when there is a guy involved you would rather see it as your friends fault in running him off? rather then maybe seeing the truth. or like to think thats the reason so you can continue seeing him. when it comes to being inlove or falling for someone we have our blinders on at times! and don't see the red flags until it's to late.
just come out and be honest w/ him and just straight out ask him put it all out in the open then you will have your answer.
Good Luck!
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (18 July 2010):
 I would send him an e-mail explaining why you deleted the post and see where the leads, since he won't pick up the phone.
Good luck, and I suggest you two deal with stuff over the phone and of the Internet if you don't want your business out there on the net.
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (18 July 2010):
 He seems like he's blowing the thing a little out of proportion, but it sent a very bad message deleting the post. How would you feel if he did the same to you? It would feel like he's embarrassed by you and doesn't want you on his wall. I understand you don't like public relationships, but it would feel to him like you don't want the public knowing you're with him. Which would hurt a lot! You should leave an apology on his voicemail apologizing for it. Don't put in any clauses like "I'm sorry but..." Just say you're sorry and it was insensitive and you didn't mean it like that.
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