A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi im 24 and me and my fiancee have been together 2yrs. we are both pretty insecure people but are expecting our first child any minute now. im very stressed atm and finding work mentally demanding alongside all the preparations for baby. anyway now full term she wants to try induce labor and try everything. i no she likes oral so the other night i went down on her and normally i will get her close to orgasm a few times before finally letting her climax. she knows i no what im doing and how to make her climax straight away. although the other night i really tried and couldnt. she pushed me away saying i was teasing too much after 2 hours of trying. now i have totally lost my sex drive and feel like a failure. the thing is if i dont make passes at her regularly she thinks im cheating or getting it somewhere else even if i explain im just not in the mood. the morning after she wouldnt even kiss me before i left for work. any thoughts would be appreciated.
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fiance, in the mood, insecure, orgasm, sex drive, teasing Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2010): shes hormonal and unreasonable. ;) it is perfectly normal at this stage of the pregnacy. Just reassure the best you can. What ever you do will be wrong and it has nothing to do with you. Take it from me. It will fix its self. ;) (i have 7 kids lol) mal
A
female
reader, ForeverDawn +, writes (4 January 2010):
 Keep trying if that makes her feel better and don't feel bad sometimes during pregnancy it gets harder for women to orgasm sometimes they won't have orgasms at all is just part of all the changes the body goes through when expecting a child
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (4 January 2010):
You're not a failure. She has a lot on her mind, and probably couldn't concentrate. Have patience, and keep making passes because she will appreciate them. But she will have a lot on her mind, so more than anything make sure she knows you love her and take a lot of care over her.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2010): Well if her kissing you is completely dependent on whether you made her orgasm the night before, i'd say you have bigger problems. But I believe I might be valuing the meaning of a kiss too highly. She trusts you so little that any loss in sex drive immediately means you are cheating? Now that's a problem (even if it's an understandable one most of the time).
It sounds like you were giving her oral sex for the explicit purpose of having her give you love afterwards. Tell her when she shows you physical affection, like kissing, it makes you feel loved, that you need to feel loved sometimes, and that you have felt in the past that you needed to make her feel sexually satisfied just so she would love you. It's going to sound "needy," but everyone needs to feel loved by the person they love.
Neediness usually means that one person feels insecure about whether the other person loves him/her. In some cases, the other person does NOT love the needy one, and you get the situation that can be really horrifying where one person keeps reaching out to someone who is just a selfish idiot. But if she is willing to have a child with you, I am going to go out on a limb and say she loves you.
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