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female
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anonymous
writes: Ive been with my boyfriend now, on and off for 13 months, but recently things have been even worse. These past few days have been especially bad. We had a major argument two nights ago something insignificant and he just blew his top, and ended it right there on the spot, he even deleted my phone number after a few hours. Then the next night i took some stuff of his which he'd left at mine, back round to his place. We argued some more and after a short while there was nothing left to say, and we were silent for a few minutes. Until he told me to go over to him and give him a hug, which afterwards he told me that he loved me and wants to give it another go, i said yes. But now, today, he is being funny with me again, not answering my texts or calls and then when he does he is off with me. Help im confused. I love this guy, but i dont know if i can take these arguments and the on and off-ness anymore.
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female
reader, marie78 +, writes (11 November 2006):
He wants what he wants when he wants it. Did that make sense? Your on and off again ex is yanking your chain. He is immature and doesn't know how to treat a woman in a relationship. But lets not put all the blame on him... you're co-signing his behavior. That is, you're allowing him to treat you like crap... everytime he gets upset and breaks it off with you, you forgive him and let him back into your life. So, you're definitely part of the problem, rather than the solution. See, I can relate, because I've been there. But once I realized my role in the situation, I took control (It's difficult, but you have to be string). It's time to stop blaming him for the failure of your relationship and take responsibility for your own happiness. Also, you're self-esteem (when it comes to relationships) seems to be low. Please seek the help of a counselor or therapist-- it helps! Get out of this relationship- he doesn't care about you! These words sound harsh, but it's reality! As women, we can't let men mistreat us, and it becomes easy to do so, because we don't wsnt to be lonely. Good luck!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 November 2006):
This is an example of where people dont give enough information.
Does something "insignificant" mean that you were trying to get you way or change him on a point that you felt was small and obviously for his good? He might not have seen that as all that "insignificant".
Or, were you fighting about something insignificant but in a hurtful way?
To me it seems like he probably already made the decision to get rid you you. If you'd like to change that decision you'll need to find out why the events were significant to him.
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A
female
reader, xLEAHx  +, writes (8 November 2006):
 Hi Anon,
First you need to find the root to your arguments and whats causing them..when you said he ended the relationship and then you got back together and he was offish with you ,sounds like the argument you had before whatever it was about was still bothering him,some couples constantly argue about silly things make up and go through life like that and are totally happy..if he really loves you and wants to be with you then he should be answaring your calls and txts and making an effort into putting things right between you,you need to find out from him does he really want to be with you for sure as he may of only wanted to get back with you because he felt bad and didn't want to hurt you..talk to him find out if there's anything bothering him and why he is blowing hot and cold on you when your meant to be making another go at your relationship.
GOODLUCK
xLEAHx
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