A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:Hi7 months after a nasty divorce i met the girl of my dreams, she was a virgin when we met and there was a age gap of 10 years which did not matter to us. Three months down the line and after a very bad day at work as a policeman, we met in a pub for a drink and taking out what had happened at work that day i said the wrong things to her and she finished with me on the spot, i dont know what to do to get her back as i really do love her, my son thinks i am mad in losing her as he had hoped i would ask her to marry me so that he would have a mum again, as his mum and my ex-wife does not care about us, what do i do to get her back.
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 June 2007): Hi I am not sure why being a policemen constitutes you to have a bad day so I puzzled why you mentioned that. I realise we all download our day, but maybe you put her off that you were moaning and groaning about your bad day at work. I realise you have a difficult job, dealing with scum a lot of the time, but never ever make it an excuse. I am a detective so know what it is like. Your time with your girlfriend, family and children not be relayed in minute detail, it should be something of frienship and yes confiding but not expecting her to pick up the pieces of your day.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2007): My instincts are abuzz here and I agree with DV1 on this. She may have been planning to cut you loose for awhile now. Because when two people love each other a great deal..they do tolerate the others bad moods, a lot. You would not believe what people who love each other...put up with. Just read some of the posting on this site...it's amazing how people in love take crap from their beloveds. So..really think long and hard about this. Here are theoretical things that could've happened. I am wondering if you have said some 'hurtful things' to her many, many times already and she simply got fed up. She might have been withdrawing from you, already but you missed the warning signs. (did affection wane? did she seem distant? did she stop talking about future plans, anymore? did she forget to return your phone calls or emails, more often? was sex waning a lot?)
I'm not stating this all has happened, you can pick and choose which may or may not apply to you. Just wanted to throw some signs out at you that you may have missed. Or she could've been the type of strong girl that had a 'no BS' credo about she was to be treated. Maybe she set boundaries in the past and you ignored them. If you are determined to get her back..all you can dois try to talk to her and find out what really happened...in her mind to so suddenly turn off you. You may never get an answer or she may even tell you. All you can do is ask. If it is like I suspect and laid out to you above..then take what you are told by her and learn from this experience. You can't make her come back to you..nor can you make her love you. She has to get there all on her own. Take care and I wish you the best of luck getting this resolved.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2007): I would tell her that i loved her and apologise for what i said in the pub, and ask for a second chance, if she says no, she means no.
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A
male
reader, DV1  +, writes (3 June 2007):
 If she dumped you on the spot, then she was probably looking for an excuse all along. Generally, people are willing to forgive and forget.
DV1
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A
female
reader, flower girl +, writes (3 June 2007):
 Have you tried contacting her since this happened and what has her responce been if so?
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