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After 2 years why do I still feel heartbroken?

Tagged as: Breaking up<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (14 May 2009) 3 Answers - (Newest, 18 May 2009)
A male United Kingdom age 36-40, *ndy00 writes:

Hi everyone.

A lot of you will know about me and my first relationship. It was long distance and it lasted for 2 years (read more about it on my profile). I've recently signed into MSN messenger for the first time since I last spoke to my ex back in February 2008. The first thing I did was delete her and block her. I knew I had to, because there is no way I could handle talking to her. We broke up nearly 2 years ago, and thinking about how things didn't work between us still feels me with an overwhelming sadness. As I sit here typing this I feel like the room is spinning. I feel numb.

Why do I feel this way? Surely I should be over losing her by now? I've been away from her for nearly as long as I was with her in the first place. She may have been my best friend, and she may have disappeared from my life very suddenly, but should I really feel so down at this stage? We haven't talked in over a year and it breaks my heart knowing that I'm not strong enough to talk to her.

I've broken one of the final strings of contacting her I have. Why do I now feel like my heart is broken?

View related questions: best friend, broke up, heartbroken, long distance, msn, my ex

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A female reader, witux  Ireland +, writes (18 May 2009):

witux  agony auntyou still feel heartbroken because you love her so much.

does she have another guy? if she hasnt found a guy in 2 years then that means that she luvz u too.

all i can say is that u should try to talk to her and tell her how u feel, she will understand u even if she makes fun of it. but she will understand. if u tell her first maybe she will tell u how she feels

good luck xoxox

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A male reader, Guitarist  United Kingdom +, writes (14 May 2009):

Guitarist  agony auntI'm gonna jump in the dark here, but what always helps me move on from a 'failed' relationship is persue a new one. then you're focusing on the girls rather than the old who by now must have had new relationships with other guys i'm sorry to say. my point being she isnt sitting at home in a spinning room so why should you? live your life and find someone new to be happy with. do it!!! now!!!

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A female reader, bellaaddison United States +, writes (14 May 2009):

You're letting go in stages and that's ok. Sometimes the best way to do it... gradually and as you're ready. But that means each time you decide to let go alittle more, you're reminded of just what it is you're letting go of all over again.

Don't be so hard on yourself. Love is a deep and powerful emotion. Coming to terms with the loss of it can hurt, deeply and for a long time in some cases.

Just hold on to the fact that one day you will discover that your heart truly has healed and the pain has found a home in the past.

Be patient and kind to yourself.

Bella xoxo

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