A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Just asking. Is it really happening,when the husband and wife is living together for nearly 10 years the sex life is gone? i mean, my husband and me are nearly 10 years now. i dont know but its already 8 months now that he dont even think about sex, even i tried to speak to him about this. is that really normal? or he just getting tired of this relationship. I feel that the spark is gone, the excitement is gone. i mean he is here, he said he love me and i see no third party, but he more like now to watch movie. Dont get it wrong, he dont even want to watch porn. He just simply dont wanna think anything bout sex. I feel like, we are just like room mates now. Im scared, very scared i dont know how long i can stand this. im praying too, that i can stand this for another 20 years of our life. One reason i come here, i read some problems, i wanna know that i am not alone suffering with this situation and how do they manage to handle and stay with this. Im a truly faithful wife and dont wanna ruin my marriage, but what shall i do. Please, please heeelllppp... tnx a lot..
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (30 August 2013):
 you are not alone. we are married less than a year and my 40 yr old hubby has hit a spot... it comes and goes for him
if your husband has not had a complete medical work up including hormones he needs that first... men have "male menopause" where they can get LOW Testosterone... that affects energy, libido and a bunch of other things.
if you have not talked to him about it. talk to him.. tell him "I love you and I need you and i want you.. and if you love me but do not feel the urge to show me, can we please get a medical work up to make sure you are ok?"
A
female
reader, Dear Mandy  +, writes (30 August 2013):
 HI
Every marriage hits a stale patch. It is perfectly normal and 9 times out of 10 it will pass. However men can also go through a menopause, so he may be feeling a little down or depressed. He assured you there is no one else and that he loves you, which is a good thing. maybe you could try going back to basics, like dating once a week, more cuddles and kisses without the pressure of sex , make an effort in dressing up to look and feel good about yourself, which will make him also feel like your making the effort. Sometimes we get so wrapped up in life we forget why we fell in love in the first place , so maybe a little trip down memory lane would be nice too, eg take him back to the place you had your first date.
Good Luck
Mandy x
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