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female
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes: I am 17 year old young woman! I have a strong attraction to a local cop, because he responded to a home invasion when i was all alone one summer.. I fell for him because he was such a quick responder, like 5 mins. He was so sweet, very experienced. He was very protective, when he searched my house, he always made sure i remained behind him. I sensed he liked me. He called me my lover, smirked at me. I could see that glare in his eyes. Anyway about 3 months ago i went and told him i loved him. He said he understands that sometimes happens. He sent me to the hospital because i got emotional. I really love him and I’m so alone and lately he's been avoiding me. I need him so bad, i am in a dark place and in desperate need for affection and companionship. how and where can i get him to talk to me without anyone knowing? Pls help!
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male
reader, VitaminZ  +, writes (23 July 2017):
Stay away from him until you're 18... The time will fly anyways. If you're still crushing on him when your 18 take your shot.
A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious  +, writes (22 July 2017):
 Oh sweetheart, you are not REALLY in love with this man. You know nothing about him, therefore you cannot love him. You are doing what many before you have done, i.e. fixating on a man who has been kind to you and protective of you, and who you see as your "saviour". As others have said, it is his JOB to do what he did. It is not, however, his job to look after you going forward.
He was very wrong to call you "my lover", but he probably does that to all the females he tried to protect. It is probably just his "way".
If you carry on trying to make contact with him, he will have no alternative but to be horrible to you to get you to leave him alone. I know you don't want that. He does not want to ruin his career, which he would if he had a relationship with you. He could also already be in a relationship and have no wish to jeopardize that. What you also have to realize is that he does not feel the same way about you as you do about him. Your infatuation (because this is all it is) is not mutual. You cannot force him to want you or even like you. You can, however, make him hate you if you carry on hounding him. Don't make him hate you. Leave him alone and walk away from this with dignity.
Are you getting professional help for your mental health issues? If not, then PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE go to see your doctor and ask for help. You CAN feel better - but this man is not your saviour.
Sending hugs and wishing you a brighter future.
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A
female
reader, Dionee'  +, writes (22 July 2017):
 He was there when you needed him. That´s part of why you like him. You need to realise that you are not in love and that you´re looking really crazy to this guy right now. You need to realise that´s it´s a part of his job to be quick and alert. Do not mistake this for special treatment.
The other part of your problem is that you´re too lonely and desperate right now. That is why you think that you love this guy. If it wasn´t him, it would have been some other guy, trust me on that and that is mainly because you´re in a vulnerable state right now.
My advice is to cool it with contacting this guy. You should keep contact to a bare minimum if not quitting it all together.
I hope that you take the advice that you´re being given here. It will help you loads.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (22 July 2017):
 You don't love THIS guy, you are infatuated with the idea of this guy. You are obsessed with this man whom you see as your "rescuer" and "hero". The policeman himself is actually a total stranger to you.
You are acting like an obsessed person, so yes I think he was right in sending you to the hospital.
The words he used when dealing with you when he responded to the home invasion was ill picked but I think he used THOSE words to take your focus off your panic and fear. That is his job. To respond, to search the house, keep the inhabitant(s) safe - he didn't respond FASTER because he knew you lived there or search with you behind him for your sake - IT IS HIS JOB! Had you been 50 and a dude it would have been the same.
He IS avoiding you because he has RECOGNIZED that you are not doing so well with your mental health. The last thing HE needs is an obsessive stalking teenager ruining his career and life. And the LAST thing you NEED is to start living in some fantasy land where this guy will "rescue" you from your dark place.
Where are the adults in your life? Your parents? When you went to the hospital did you see a therapist/psychiatrist? If so, I suggest you get some more sessions so that YOU can DEAL with that dark place you feel you are stuck in. The Policeman CAN NOT help you with that. HE is NOT qualified to help people with their mental health issues.
Instead of focusing on this guy and your fantasy - YOU need to deal with your issues HEAD ON. Make yourself and your mental health your PRIORITY.
And you NEED to leave the policeman ALONE. He can NOT help you. By ignoring you he is telling you in NO uncertain terms that he IS NOT interested in you in the way YOU would like him to be. It happens. It's called having a crush or being infatuated with someone.
So TALK to your parent(s) and get help with your issues.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (22 July 2017):
 You are in love with the idea of a heroic policeman, this policeman did the right thing sending you to the hospital.
I think it would be very beneficial for you to seek some professional advise on your fixation, either from a doctor or a counsellor.
The policeman is avoiding you because your obsession could put his career and whole life in jeopardy. You need to recognise the fact he is avoiding you is a strong message to stop what you are doing. This man does not want to talk to you either with, or without, people knowing. Leave him alone!
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