A
female
age
26-29,
*lizaS01
writes:Hi! So I start at a new college in September and Im really nervous/scared. I dont know anyone on the course I'm starting, so it's like a fresh start. I have trouble starting a conversation, talking to new people and joining in with conversations. I'd like and appreciate any help, advice, previous experiences if you have had any and how you and your friends got talking? Thankyou x Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (22 August 2012):
Remember that every fourth person you encounter is in your position....
Be yourself.... smile a lot... listen a lot....
Study hard....
Enjoy yourself...
Good luck..
A
female
reader, Dorothy Dix  +, writes (22 August 2012):
Hi there. It's always a bit of a challenge, when you start a new phase of your education.
I think the very best advice that I could give to you, would be that once you are actually attending your classes each day, you will find that perhaps even in your very first class, you could just get talking to the girl who happens to sit next to you.
Because until that first day of class in your new college begins, you don't know who's going to be in that class.
There will probably be any number of girls there, who seem friendly and who appeal to you as a possible new friendship.
There's not much point in worrying about it now, as you can't do anything until that first day of class comes.
Just so long as you keep a nice friendly expression on your face, which is the very first stage of developing any new friendship.
Because if you have a nice friendly, open expression on your face, it makes you look very approachable and people will automatically be drawn towards you.
And in order to have that nice friendly and open expression, you first need to feel relaxed inside - and then it shows on the outside.
A person who feels a lot of anxiety, will have a very serious or even kind of angry look on their face, even though it isn't anger that they feel.
Nevertheless, it shows upon their face as being aggressive and consequently unfriendly, and that's not what you want, is it?
And when a person sees someone who has that closed, unapproachable look about them, well then others WILL NOT come up to them and say "Hi!"
So the secret really, is to relax and don't worry one tiny little bit about it.
And if you DO feel a tiny bit anxious on your very first day of the new college, simply take a few slow, deep breaths to calm you down.
It does work, and when you feel relaxed, you will also be feeling a lot more confident, as a result.
And all these things will make you appear calm, open and friendly and therefore, very approachable.
This will attract others towards you, and those people will end up being your friends!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2012): hey I started college last year and don't worry everybody gets a bit nervous but college isn't like high school, you're not the only one who's new, so people are a lot more open to make new friends, and don't worry if you don't make a lot of friends in your first term, (or is it semester? don't really know how you call it in the UK ) anyway you'll meet even more people later from different classes/degrees and about conversation, just be yourself, I never thought there was such thing as the right thing to say the situation will tell you what is a good ice breaker, on my first day I talked to so many people lol and I'm kind of shy, later on I talked to most people I sat by during the classes and mostly we talked about professors, essays stuff like that.
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