A year after our break up he wants me back. Did I do the right thing by ending our relationship?

A female age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Hi there. I was in a live-in relationship with a guy. I loved him more than my life. I would help him in every possible way. He said that he loved me a lot and it seemed so,too but we had lots of fights over his drinking ( daily), smoking weed and what I felt was ogling at other females ( which he vehemently denied). He was also very suspicious of me all the time and would not let me talk to any guys ( and sometimes , even girls), my cousins and basically everyone except my family. He said that he wanted to protect me as I am very innocent. So, it was kinda bad because the fights used to get physical with both of us hitting each other and later, apologizing. Then, I saw his whole porn visits on the computer. Please don't tell me it's okay because I never looked at another male even for a second when I was with him and then, if he liked it, he should have been honest and let me decide whether I wanted to stay or not. Isn't that a sign of an honest relationship? So, we had a bad fight but he said that he had just done that in anger angry because I use to ask him all the time if he was sleeping with prostitutes ( coz once when I had talked to a guy, he had told me that he will sleep with a whore to take revenge). So, we fought a lot but I trusted him in the end. But then, I couldn't help but think that he must be lying all the time. So, we had fights again and he would say that he liked his weed and his drink, so, I fought more. Then, one day he was gone and I thought that if drinking gives so much of happiness then I had better drink, too. So, I got drunk and then, went looking for him ( he had gone out in anger). I never drink, so, that was too much for me. I lost all sense. I met a guy and I told him my sob-story. He came home with me and we drank some more. He tried to kiss me but I told him that I loved my bf and was just looking for a friend. He left after that and wished me good luck. Never once did I think of anything sexual or even flirtatious. My bf came home the next day and saw the champagne bottle. He knew that I don't drink, so, he grew curious and I told him what had happened. He called me a slut and called up my parents to tell them that I lived with him ( they didn't know). He left me and went to his friend's place. I begged and pleaded for days but he just insulted me in front of everyone. My parents came and they just told me to pack my bags. I felt so humiliated. He kept calling my dad to tell him about our sexual relationship. Thank God, my parents left it at that and did not say anything to me. So, I begged still but he told me to move on. Even though I was heartbroken, I had no other option. I moved on in my life. Then, after a few weeks, he started calling me again and saying sorry. I stopped picking up his calls and then, complained to the police. He did not care. He kept calling. I just ignored him. One year later, I picked up his call and he said that he was sorry and wanted me back. I told him to leave me alone but wished him luck. He said that his life is empty without me but I said that I could not trust him anymore. He said that he will keep waiting for me all his life. Did I do the right thing?

View related questions: cousin, drunk, flirt, heartbroken, move on, porn, prostitute, revenge

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