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female
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*lazelady4494
writes: This is hard to talk about because I don't even know myself. But me and my husband been together for 15 years and we’ve had our ups and down, but 2 weeks ago he said to me he’s not sure if he loves me or not, or if he just here for with the kids.I asked him why he feels this way and he says he not sure and that he has problems with himself that he doesn't really know what they are. And then we agreed to go to counselling and get some help. Since then we been talking and spending time together and even making love and I made him give me an answer yes or no if he wants to be with me or not, and if he loves me. He said yes. I asked him if there was someone else. He said to me he was interested in why a 21-year-old would like him and that’s it. I asked him if she did anything and he says she asked him to go out for a drink and he was supposed to say no because he has problems at home. I said, what if she ask you out? He said he would tell her no. I am trying to believe him, but since we started talking and making love, it’s just not the same. It’s like he’s in the distance and not all the way there. He says it’s nothing, but it scares me so much that it is something. I need help to think all this through and to see the big picture on it all. Please help Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Diane312006 +, writes (5 February 2006):
i know exactly how you're feeling about this situation, my husband and i have been together for 15 years and he got involved , by talking to a 22 year old girl and he keeps telling me that he isn't cheating on me, but i'm told different stories by other people, he says that he loves me but he acts so guilty inside.
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female
reader, Delila +, writes (11 October 2005):
Your husband asked you why would a 21 year old be interested in him? The correct answer needs to be that he is so sexy hot delicous that any woman would interested in him. Making love with your husband must not be a rare event and neither must pure sex for sex sake. We all like to make love but there is something about raw animal sex. Read some erotic material to get you horny. Do some "dirty" stuff with your husband. Make sure he knows you fancy him like crazy! How do you do that? Remember when you first started dating, I'll bet you laughed at all his jokes! I bet you made yourself up nice when you knew he was meeting you? Did you shave your legs and wear your best underwear or maybe none at all? Common woman you have your man! Now let him know you intend to keep him!
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reader, pops +, writes (10 October 2005):
Stay with the counseling, and tell the counselor, when you see him/her alone, about what is currently causing you stress with your husband. He has a lot of self image problems, and maybe some problems with his career. He obviously loves you, or he would not be going to counseling. So, cut him some slack. Flirt with him daily. When you make love, ask him if he thinks the other woman would be doing this to him, as well as you do( whatever you are doing to him at the moment?) Get him to laugh at himself, and appreciate all he has with you. Plus by making him laugh about some other woman hitting on him, it will make it easier for him to say " no " to her. Whatever the other woman may have to offer, she probably would have a fit if she found out he was being hit on by another woman, instead of making light of the situation, and laughing at it with him. Jealousy is simply an expression of self doubt. If you are still making a serious effort to pleasure your husband, and he does to you, he has no reason to find another woman, and you have no reason to worry. Yes, this gets a little dicey when you have children in a small home, but adults can find time to play with each other every day. It may be late at nite, or in the morning shower, or both, but where there is a will, you will find a way.
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