A
female
age
41-50,
*owan's Mom
writes:I'm 28 Years old and I've been Married since Jan 09. I have been with my husband on and off for about 5 Years. We have a 2 year old little girl together. My problem is My husband doesn't seem to Care anymore about my feelings, I have to beg him for Sex and he just tells me He's too tired, I know I shouldn't have to beg but when you don't get it but maybe once a month, it changes a person's whole Character if sex is important to you. He works, But I go to school full time, take care of the Home front. He comes home, gets on the computer, watches T.v. We don't sleep in the same bed, We switch from the Couch or the bed. I've already done the asking, the trying, the begging, and we broke up before About this very subject. I'm trying for my daughter, I have two boys from a previous marriage and I just tremble of the thought of her having a step mom. I have enough drama with my Two boy's step mom, I couldn't handle another one. Marriage counseling wouldn't be an option, He wouldn't go. Were just Roomates with Wedding Rings on, I mean I tell him I love him, and yes he tells me back but thats it.. No kiss no hug, I have to initiate any physical contact. He tells me that I need to Not Push him and maybe he'll be the one to make the first move.. haha That's totally false I've already tried that approach. We got an a argument this morning and he always Texts or calls to tell me sorry or something.. that's been 5 hours ago now and Still nothing.. I'm at a loss, anyone have any ideas for me??
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2010): I'm so sorry you have to go through this, I've been there and it is extremely painful! In my case, I did get physical affection and he told me he loved me all the time BUT he had a porn addiction and he couldn't stop masterbating long enough to take care of my sexual needs :(
I feel so bad for you because this is crazy making stuff...when you want to make love to someone, and they are right there, but you can't have it!!! I don't have any advice for how to make yourself feel differently, but I want you to know that there is someone out here that understands how frustrated you are!
I hope things work out for you.
I think there is one question you need to ask yourself...can you live without sex or can you fulfill your sexual needs with an affair? IT is very unlikely that your husband will change, especially if you are bugging him for sex, the pressure to perform just turns men off more :( It is truly a lose/lose situation for you.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2010): Hello sounds like he's totally distant from you. Emotionally, physically, and making you feel very unwanted. You've somewhere lost that important connection with him. He doesn't want to talk to a counselor. It doesn't seem as though he wants to change this situation. If he's not willing to change or compromise then maybe its time for you to find someone that can.
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