A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:Thank you in advance to anyone who takes the time to answer. I go out with the girls for coffee every Friday afternoon but today was a disaster. One of my friends called me at work and asked if I would be coming. I really was in the middle of something but said that I should be there by four but I had a lot of work to do. The phone was acting up and I could not hear her response. I got there at four pm and found out that everyone else had been there about an hour....again not the end of the world.I asked what had happened that I was an hour late and my friend who called me said that I told her on the phone that I was busy and did not have time. She is a terrific person and I have never known her to be confontational but both of us got snappy in front of our friends and other patrons in the coffee shop... out of character for both of us. She was still upset and left the table to speak to another of our friends about it. I felt bad and was told that she has not been feeling well and all week and has been feeling emotional. I took control of the situation and took her aside and apologised...I really do not recall being rude or offensive but did not say that. She accepted the apology and looked like things were ok after that. Here is my question. If someone is confrontational with you like that once...will it happen again. I try not to confront people in front of others if I can help it...I know I have done if a few time but it is humiliating.
View related questions:
at work Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2007): It sounds as if this is not who she really is if indeed she had a bad week. That was really mature of you to apologize though. Yuo have to ask yourself the question of : have you seen her confront others? Is she the type of person that thrives on this type of behavior to show people how strong she is? or is she truly good freind with a good heart that just snapped?
So the answer to your question is: if you feel she is not the type and only had a bad day, chances are no or very rarely and you just need to talk to her. If she is the type of woman that's vicious, then yes absolutetly she will do it again.
The same sort of thing happened to me on sat nite at a dinner club. This "friend" of mine attacked me by saying how I was so rude to her guest last sat nite at her valentine's party and rude to her worker when I visited her at her store 2 weeks ago. I have seen her being confrontational before but never expected to be confronted by her especially with false accusations. My situation is more complicated bec there were events that led to this. I think it's a sitaution where I was no longer accepted for who I was: outrageuous,speak my mind but never insulting . I have not changed but she has. So I would never put myself in this situation again because the whole thing is over. We have been friends for 4 months now.
A
female
reader, CRYSTAL23 +, writes (3 February 2007):
 I find from my experience as i was a very passive person,it happened alot to me,Im very sensitive and nice and when i do get frutrated or angry and say somethin i dint mean i feel really bbad about it too,but you know what ,most of the time if u appoligize(especially for something that did not even happen),that person will take advantage and do this again to you,i really hope not but alot of people just like the attention of being sucked up too by others and for others to feel bad for them so try to be more asseertive as i am trying and its working an i feel alot better about it.
...............................
|
