A
female
age
30-35,
*riaz
writes:A good friend of mine cut me off a few months ago because she didn't like a decision I was making (See previous question for more details). She just texted me apologizing for what she did and hopes I can forgive her. And I'm not sure how to react. On one hand, I've missed her a lot, and had wished that she would reach out to me again. On the other hand, I've grown used to not hearing from her. I'm struggling with whether or not I should hear her out and tell her how it made me feel, or if I should just ignore her. What should I do?
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 November 2021): If I remember rightly - please forgive me if this is wrong - your friend did not approve of you meeting a guy. If this is right, I remember thinking to myself it is really none of her business, you can meet him without telling people if you want to keep it quiet and not have their judgments. She may be watching out for you and perhaps scared it will all go wrong and you get hurt or she has to pick up the pieces, which is understandable if she cares, but in a way that is still talking as if she is smart and you are dumb, and that is the bit that would have got to me if I were you. She is not your mother and you do not need her approval. Nor do you need to tell her everything you do and every meet you have. On the other hand if it does go wrong you are not entitled to run to her for help or sympathy then. You need to remember that a lot of guys are eager to meet up with a young woman in the hope of sex, they are not too fussy about who or whether or not she is a dentist or a shelf filler in a supermarket so long as she puts out quick and cheap. Guys may say all of the right things to get you to turn up, it does not mean that they are seeking to fall in love, see you again, have a relationship, or care a toss about you. Young men in particular are often opportunists when it comes to sex/fun. No matter what a guy tell you he could be totally different and nasty, unreliable and dishonest at best, violent etc at worst. The thing is does your friend trust your judgment? If she believes that you are very naive and immature and silly and arrange to meet unsuitable or unproven men when it is dangerous or unwise that does not say much for her opinion of you. On the other hand if this is the case is she right?
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (27 November 2021):
 If you could link your other post it might help the Aunties and Uncles.
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