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female
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anonymous
writes: when i was 15 i developed a crush on my high school teacher/coach. i'm now 21, out of high school, and still can't stop thinking about him.i've kept in touch with him this whole time, and he has constantly been sending me mixed signals (which is why i'm still not over it). having long and personal conversations, exchanges of long and personal emails, him complementing me, saying how we're on the same level. stuff like that. i recently invited him out to the bar (without mention of his girlfriend who is also a teacher), and made it pretty clear what i was trying to do. he showed up, but with his gf (who i'm also friends with).i know he knows how i feel, and i can't shake the feeling that he might feel the same way. i don't understand why he would be so suggestive with me and keep in touch with me, if he didn't feel anything. now he's getting married to her. and i don't know what to do. nothing really was ever said between us, and i don't know if i should say anything. i don't know how to stop missing him.WHAT SHOULD I DO?!p.s. - his girlfriend knows how i feel about him but yet continuously trys to keep in touch with me...they make it impossible for me to get over it!
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 November 2006): Whats his first name? lol
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 September 2006): seems to me that he brought his girlfriend with him to the bar as a means to subtly let you know that that's where his heart is, and that he ultimately wants to be your friend. especially since he's choosing to marry this woman. i suggest that if you like him this much, and that you can't move on because of the amount of contact you have with him, that you break all form of contact for a while and give it time to heal. it's practically impossible to get over someone when they're constantly in your face all the time. good luck.
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female
reader, anon2907  +, writes (17 September 2006):
 Ew, weird.
I could get the whole thing, apart from the gf knowing how you feel and yet continuously keeping in contact with you - that just sounds weird. I can't quite see where they're coming from on this.
I guess both the guy and his gf are older than you and look down on you affectionately keeping in contact and so on and kinda expecting you to get over your crush at some point??
It sounds to me like his behaviour is a little over the boundary and perhaps the gf wouldn't be so understanding if she knew about the emails and so on.
Either way - it's pretty clear from both of them that they're not going to let you pursue your crush any further so you need time out to get over it. Easier said that done, I know, but maybe you can think up a reason not to have contact over a few months and then just keep contact to a minimum until you're over things.
Good luck,
Anon2907
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