A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi guys just looking for a little hope I guess. What I want to know is if anyone believes in true love any more? I have been cheated on and messed around with more times than I care to remember. Despite all this I KNOW i am a good person and deserve better but i'm 27 and i'm starting secretly to worry that I will never meet THE ONE and die alone. I am by no means desperate but I crave a relationship with someone I mean the world to (yes im libran)and who would never do the wrong thing by me. I am thinking of throwning in the towel on this love buisness so please give me some hope!!! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2008): I am a little younger than you and probably less experienced in the world of relationships but I relate to your situation somewhat.
If you are anything like me it's that you don't want to settle for less. I'm not talking in terms of some perfectly sculpted, overtly rich, charming man.. but just of a man perfectly suited to you.
I really hope that you don't lose hope, don't let your thoughts of the future be clouded by men who have mistreated you in the past. You are single now because you know you deserve better than that.
If you look in the right places I guarantee you there are still plenty of single guys around your age who do know how to treat a girl, please don't lose hope.
A
female
reader, lleternal_sunshinell  +, writes (4 February 2008):
 I have an old co-worker who used to be a mentor to me. She would tell me all about her life, and one of the most remarkable aspects was her love life. Her first husband beat her, broke her nose, and was emotionally and physically abusive with her. He turned their son against her, and convinced her that she was ugly and deserved every bad thing to happen to her. She finally saw a counselor and learned that she was worth better and divorced him. She was in 50s and had many offers over the years, because she is a pretty, kind, funny, bubbly, and hard working person. But she knew that she was not going to settle and she was going to find the man of her dreams. And she did! They are SO happy together, and so compatible, and they take care of each other so well. They are like two teenagers in love over the phone, even though she is much older than you (27) and me (24). Love comes at anytime in our lives, you just have to have faith! Just hold onto hope and don't settle for anyone but the best.
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A
female
reader, autumnleaves07  +, writes (4 February 2008):
Hey there. Reading your message I felt like I could have written it myself! I think everybody is secretly worried that they won't find the one, and it's SO hard when you've been messed around by people you thought would never treat you badly. Life is so hard, and love can be both wonderful and cruel. But you're still young, and have lots to look forward to. You never know who is around the corner, and in my experience, it's when you are happiest in yourself and least expecting something to happen that someone will come along. So try your best to enjoy your life, and do things on your own to make yourself happy. The rest will come in time :) Good luck! x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 February 2008): Look in the articles secion under "Hope from experience from me to you". There are things in there that may help you. Two of my friends have only just met their true loves in their 40s and 50s. You need to select your love carefully, don't let yourself be chosen. Choose. be fearless and don't be afraid of gambling on something even if you lose.
Most of all learn what you need and only bother with good men. Don't look at one and think one day you may be something, don't look at potential. Don't think "I can help you be a better person" or "If he were with me he would not do that". Look at what is there already and particularly value kindness and unselfishness. Not a possessive man. Intelligence, character, not just looks. On the day a man will do something very kind to help you, give him another look. If he is good and patient with children, look again. Make sure what he has fits with your character and temperament before you even accept a date.
Some compromise will be necessary as you go along in a relationship but you don't need to compromise your values at the start. Have fun looking around you for a while, evaluate people and decide that you are not going to decide anything for a while. Sit in that space and smile, you will learn an awful lot.
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A
male
reader, shazman1984 +, writes (4 February 2008):
Don't throw in the towel. You'll find your prince, just because your 27 does not mean you are hopeless. My eldest brother is also 27 years old. He's not ugly, he's average looking, he works hard to take care of us, he's very very kind, and a bit shy. No drugs, he doesn't even drink. But get this, he's never been on a date in his life, no girlfriends. But he's a great undetected catch.(ha,i would never tell him this).Anyway, my point is, there are many many many guys out there just like him. There the ones who would treat u like a queen. The problem with these however, is that they're shy. So maybe the guys who have the courage to ask you out isnt your type, maybe your knight in shinning armor is waiting for you to make the first move. Die alone? not at all. Your more than welcome to give up on love, But I know for a fact it wont give up on you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 February 2008): Hi Hunny,
Oh if I could write everything down that I have been through in my life it would curl your hair sweetheart, Ive been married 3 times beaten nearly killed and my last husband cheated within the first yr of marriage and the night before our wedding. I have never given up and hunny you are worth so much you should always have faith in yourself, I was 43 before the love of my life came into my heart and ive never been happier than I am now, And he is so beautiful so it worth the wait and ive learnt alot along the way I dont regret those learning experiences as they wouldnt have made me the person I am today, So hunny never give up no matter what TAKE CARE OF YOU SWEETHEART WITH LOTS OF LOVE AND PRAYERS MANDY xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (4 February 2008):
 There are millions of women who are in the 40's and 50's and still single . You do not qualify to enter the single's club yet! LOL!
27 is just the starting age and you are at the starting blog and you want to throw in your towels!
How can you run the race when you give up your hope so quickly?
If you want love, you must give love and it will returned to you many folds. Don't go looking for love. It is like chasing the butterfly . Stay where you are and the butterfly will land on you .Don't look for love , for love will find you.
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