A
female
age
30-35,
*iquinn
writes:I am 22 and I have never dated not even for half a day.its not because I'm a prude nut I don't want to make mistakes.Right now I have a number of great guys(and I mean great) who want to date me. I've had people tell me to try it first and see if it works but I am of the opinion that relationships shouldn't be about trial and error.it doesn't seem right that way so what do I do because right now I think I'm ready to date but I want to do this right (cos I've always said i'll only date a guy if I'm crazy in love with him)...also,when I do date,how can I hide from a guy the fact that I've never dated before? Guys tend to take advantage of that knowledge,you know. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, miquinn +, writes (11 January 2012):
miquinn is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank u person12345,so very confused,starlights. Uve been of great he
lp(U probably dnt knw hw much).ul get a feedback surely...hugs
A
female
reader, person12345  +, writes (11 January 2012):
 The "real thing" is when you agree to commit to each other. Be boyfriend and girlfriend, be exclusive, etc... A conversation will have to occur at some point to clarify this. A date is pretty much anything where two people get together with the intention of figuring out whether they'd work well romantically. You are "dating" versus just going on a date if you go on more than one or two dates together, but this doesn't mean you are a couple unless you agree to be in a couple. Again, a conversation will have to occur about this.
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A
female
reader, miquinn +, writes (11 January 2012):
miquinn is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHello person12345.thanks for the advice,I find it really really helpful.I just need an answer to this. What then is dating? U go out for a couple of drinks,maybe dinner or lunch with a guy just to get to know eachoda beta but u both tag each encounter as a date but ure nt dating!? So what really is a date? Hats d difference between that and d real thing?
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A
female
reader, Starlights  +, writes (11 January 2012):
 Yes i am saying you have a strong attraction for this guy... but only if you get to really know him will you know if its LOVE.
Goodluck!
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (10 January 2012):
Yes and no. On the one hand waiting to get into a relationship until you find someone special is probably smart. If more people did that there would be a lot less heartbreak. But on the other hand, not dating, period, until you find "the one" is probably not a great strategy. Dating is the process of getting to know someone. You aren't committing to them in any way just by going on a few dates. Waiting to date until you're actually in love is not a realistic goal. To truly be in love with someone you either need to be their best friend (which isn't an indication they even like you back) or have been dating them for awhile. I think you need to lower your bar for what gets a guy a few dates and give them a chance. Chemistry can take some time to develop and you have to let it. Love at first sight isn't real, only lust at first sight or an inkling that you have good chemistry. Like I said, a few dates isn't making a commitment to be together forever, it's a few dates to see if there's some potential there.
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A
female
reader, miquinn +, writes (10 January 2012):
miquinn is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks starlight.I completely appreciate ur answer but this is what I mean...amongst these guys wwho want to have a relationship with me,there's one in particular I have some pretty strong attraction for.I want to be crazy in love but ate you saying I may have to give it a chance to even find out if I'm in love atall?
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (10 January 2012):
 I think the issue is to DEFINE DATING… what do YOU mean by it… to me and my old fashioned thoughts a date is this:
Boy asks girl to do something (movie, dinner, dancing, a museum, a picnic--)
Girl says yes
Boy and girl complete activity
Boy and girl decide if they want to do it again
If yes
Repeat
If no.. say thank you and move on….
If yes and repeat and they continue then they might develop a serious relationship (this is what I think you are calling dating)… if so you are putting the cart before the horse so to speak….
if you find a guy to 'date' that you like and you want it to be more serious we can talk then...until then if a boy asks you for an activity say yes.. smile go have a good time... it's a DATE!
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A
female
reader, Starlights +, writes (10 January 2012):
Relationships shouldn't ideally be about trial and error, in an ideal world all relationships would be hunky dory and perfect but no relationship is perfect it either works or does not work.
Also sometimes things can crop up even in an ideal relationship that can sometimes break it apart.
I would not call these relationships a mistake; rather a learning experience.
Therefore its wise knowing every relationship carries with it a RISK.
There is no right or wrong way of dating.
If you have rapport with someone, you use the date to get to know him slowly better... only after some time of knowing someone... can you truly know someone's character to love them.
You dont need to hide anything from someone your crazy in love dating with, he would accept you as you are.
Believe this and dont worry.
You dont need to share anything private with anybody until you feel ready to do so.
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