A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hi, I've been with my girlfriend for 19 months now, and lately i have been going off her. she is aggresive at times and she goes crazy at the slightest thing e.g sniffing, coughing. i do love her but i think im going off her, i dont know what to do. she is the first real relationship i have had. i dont think there is a day that goes by that we dont ague!. what shall i do? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, not understanding  +, writes (12 August 2010):
y dont u just tell her you are feeling this way. if she has heads up on how u feel about her problems , then maybe she will get it together, if she doesnt, atleast you already told her yue were ready to leave her.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 August 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you both,
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 August 2010): Wow... getting psycho over a cough or sneeze sounds like she is not happy.
I suggest you take her to do someting she really likes- try to really spoil her a bit, and then have a chat..
The chat? Tell her how much you love her, be specific about some of the things you really like about her, tell her she is important to you, then tell her you are trying to understand what is going on between you as you think she may not be happy. Tell her you are really listening and then listen like you never have before. Stay calm, cool, let her say whatever it is she has to say without reacting. Yes... even if it gets up your nose... let her finish... let her get it all out.
One of 2 things will happen... she will let it all out and become so incredibly close to you because you showed you care and that you can listen. You will win new levels of intimacy, trust and respect.
Alternatively... she may well share a secret you don't want to hear. She may tell you she is not happy in the relationship and wants to end it. Please be ready for this , but wouldn't you rather know than hang around in pain for another 6 months ( like many of us do)?
I hope you get the love and intimacy you deserve.
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A
female
reader, daisy92 +, writes (11 August 2010):
try new things with her? maybe you's are bored? for example take her out on dates, give her a nice massage. just something to make her happy and make you's a bit closer. am sure she will do the same to you, to. good luck
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