A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Mode Note OP's own title:I have a close guy friend,we've agreed we have feelings for each other but he isnt single and Im not prepared to take things further in this situation. We crossed the friendship boundary once but have gone back to friends. We are in regular contact (weekly at least) If he isnt going to be about he tells me. The last few months hes not been the same and blanked a text (something hes never done) after a couple of weeks of no contact I sent a text asking if he was OK. His reply said he he isnt talking to anyone, he doesnt need other peoples problems and has his own etc this ending have a good birthday ...take care Clearly he has something going on which he doesnt want to talk about and wants to be left alone, but the only time a guy ever text "take care" to me was when he dumped me so I see this in a negative way thinking I am never going to see/hear from him again. I know I am over analysing this but what do guys mean by ending a text with with this phrase....Someone help before I drive myself nuts!!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2017): Top old post I know but its def goodbye
A
male
reader, Arivor +, writes (20 September 2017):
Why not? Let's just overthink this "Take care" thing.
1. I want you to take care of yourself, because I like you and want you to stay around to be with, talk or whatever.
2. I'm about to do something stupid like kill myself and will no longer be around to see if your ok.
3. You really only care about yourself don't you. Well, do what you do best and take care. I tried, you didn't and I'm done.
Let's stop there.. Ya know all you really need to do is ask the person "What do you mean by take care?" It's amazing how that just works.
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A
male
reader, AlFlorida +, writes (18 May 2017):
"Take care" to me is....the relationship has been nice but i am no longer interest in maintain any type of contact, on any level. So it is good bye....a softer, more polite way is "Take care"
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A
female
reader, angel kate +, writes (2 January 2015):
I am in the same. Situation as you right now,my friend is married and have 3 children we have also gone back to being friends,how confusing it does get for us sometimes, do they still want us or not ,the feeling these males gives is unclear sometimes,when my friend say's TAKE CARE he generally means stay safe I too thought shit was he trying to say goodbye to me, but know you have been friends for what 5 years now you mean a lot to him,as dthis moment he is having a man moment like we have our moments give him some time to figure himself out,he has far from letting you go ... hope this has help you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2010): Hi
I've just read yr mail.
I agree with the last 2 guys. Normally it means "take Care of yr self..till we meet..." and not a Goodbye forever.
In this case, I suspect that yr mate is trying to sort out some issues and is saying Goodbye...(possibly for good or till his current realtionship ends)
Hope it helps.
BTW We MEN are simple creatures really...until we are confused by women!! ;)
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2010): When I say "Take Care" I mean it and want the person to be careful so that when we speak once again they are all right. In other words, when I say the phrase I am communicating to them in a roundabout way that they are important to me and that they should be careful when being out and about.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 August 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHmm all very confusing, thanks for the responses. I forget to mention we have been friends for 5 plus yrs and the boundary crossing wasnt recent. Normally he's very direct and says what he means even if he knows its not something you'd want to hear. Whoever invented text has a lot to answer for and agreed men are complicated creatures!Any further comments welcome
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A
male
reader, mrvhappy +, writes (7 August 2010):
Hi,
WOW I am amazed at the diffrecences between guys/girls on a simple message and how it can be misconstrewed!!!!
I sign of my sms with "Take Care"...its not meant to mean GOOD BYE forever..just take care of yrself till we meet/speak/email each other again. (Kinda like a Byee for now)
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (7 August 2010):
I think in it's context it was definitely a 'goodbye, don't contact me again'
Saying he has problems and doesn't need other people's and also saying he isn't talking to anyone is his way of letting you down gently (nobody wants the guilt...right?) He is giving you the message that generally he doesn't want to communicate with anyone but really he does mean you. Saying 'take care' is his parting shot at being nice so as to spare your feelings.
He may not necessarilly be having problems...maybe you are the problem!!...and he wants you out of the equation. He knows you still have feelings for him, but if he has decided to love someone else, then you just become an inconvienience....so he has to butt you out!
I know how shitty that seems...it's painful and depressing to have to go through, but you need to now cut him out of your life completely. It's pointless trying to be a friend to someone who finds your presence in their life 'unnecessary'
Protect yourself, accept it for what it is and move on.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 August 2010): Hi, you must be feeling picked up and dropped back down after all this.
I know it is not nice, but I think he really is trying to tell you nicely that you are just friends and that's how it should stay.
He may regret going 'over that boundary' You don't sya how, but if it was a kiss or even more physical and he wanted to take it further, he would have been in regular contact even if just to keep his options open with you.
I think you have to take this as it comes across, you both crossed the line, he doesn't want to go there again, and he is trying to tell you in a nice way.
Try to date men who are single, attached people usually only go there with others for the excitement or if going through a rough patch at home.
He clearly didn't want a long term affair but does not want to hurt your feelings.
Oh, and if his texts start getting over friendly again, be polite but tell him you are not interested as he is not single. He will only be wanting to do the same thing all over again, and you already know how that hurts!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 August 2010): It depends on the circumstance. If it's said at the end of a friendly, casual conversation, where I'm from, it's just a friendly "see you next time". However, when used at the end of a defensive and shunning set of words, it means "Goodbye, and I'm not planning on returning."
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (7 August 2010): all depends who`s saying it. take care in my words are more likely to be used as another way of saying bye to somebody you dont have any desire to see again. only he could tell you that. to say it under your circumstances i would mean its unlikely you will see me again,so look after yourself.he may mean something else far different. men eh!! complicated creatures.
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