A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Well, i met a man in 2011 that had been seperated from his wife for two years. They remained friends and she was involved with soneone else. He asked her about divorce 8 months into the relationship and she said no, left her boyfriend, harrased me and he went back to her. She said her stipulation was for me to be gone. She left him a month later.. We started talking again and she did the same thing. Well after she left the second time they said it was over but remained seperated. We started talking again a couple months after she left and have been talking and intimate with only each ither for five months now. When she caught wind we were talking she came back around. She asked him to go to dinner, she asked him to go to movies, and he went. I got mad and asked their boss if she wants him back because i didnt want to go through what i did before. He got mad at me because the word got out i asked. Well we fought, and he said he wanted to continue to get back our relationship. He said he would make the decision of what he wanted when he wanted. That includes divorce. I am in such a pickle because i do love him. I canaccept them being friends, but i know her playing games messed with his head. I just want a normal relationship with this man finally and i dont know how to get there. I feel second best. But when we aretogether sexual or not we both like each others company. I wish for once i would have him completely. I try to let go and i cant. Probably much like why he wont end his marriage. Mind you, they have no kids. What should i do. How should i do it. What can i do to let him see to just let it go when she doesnt want him. She just doesnt want him with anyone else.
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male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (5 August 2013):
 Stay away from this character until he shows you his FINAL divorce papers....
THEN.... after he shows you those papers, stay away from him because he's a jerk....
Good luck....
A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (5 August 2013):
 He continues to go back to her. That's enough to know he's not fully committed to you and sadly, it is time to cut him off. Obviously, he's using you to get her to come back to him but it only lasts a short time.
You feel second best because, sadly, you are second best for him. But you could be first best for another more sensible man.
Stop wasting your time on this guy. You will never have him completely because he's not letting this woman go.
Let him go and you will lead a much happier life.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (5 August 2013):
 I think the only way is to not see him again until he has the divorce certificate to show you. Otherwise your continued meetings will show him that he is able to have his cake and eat it too. Don't talk to his boss again. You feel that he wronged you and you demand clarification, but as long as they are married you and him have no status. He is under no obligation to tell you what he's going to do or not do. If you can't let this go he doesn't see a reason to let her go either. He does not need permission to get a divorce, you also do not need to wait for him to be single again.
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