A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes: I'm a parent, I snooped on my daughter's messages. My daughter had oral sex with another boy when she (first went out with him)!! He goes to her school. My guess is also that she has done it several times before with another boy. I have had "the talk" many times with her over the subject of sex. What can I do? I don't want her to know I snooped and found out this information. Help!
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female
reader, love-him +, writes (15 June 2007):
Hia you didnt say the age of your child? Now-a-days people are interacting in sexual relationships to experiment. it is a horrible feeling of knowing this as a parent but honestly if you jhave given her the sex talk then there isnt much else you can do about it.. hope i helped, mail me if u wana talk x x x
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2007): I would be hurt just as well as you are if it was my daughter. She is going to do it with or without your approval, and I guess its better than having intercourse with them. If she is doing both maybe you should consider putting her on the pill. Maybe have a talk with her about moving to fast with a boy and explain that boys will not take her seriously and will think that she is easy. I wish you the best of luck.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew +, writes (15 June 2007):
Frankly, I don't think there is much you can do, no matter how old your daughter is.
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A
male
reader, Cag Lee "Apollo" Adarma +, writes (15 June 2007):
hey,
i am proud to say i am not a parent- because that job sucks!
you want the best for them and at the same time you want them to learn their own lessons.
You didn;t say how old your daughter is, which really is an important factor to some extent.
if shes under the age of 16 then ij would be more concerned about her using sex to validate self esteem in a forumlative and fragile time in her life.
Over 17 and the same self esteem prop maybe the case but she is approaching a 'young adult' who is bound to explore her sexuality, even if its in ways that you wouldn;t have desired for her.
You can't change the way you came upon this information but it does mean that you can;t directly raise concern or issue with it as it will open a whole other issue, confusing the first.
All you can do is be a supportive, loving and moralistic mother and try and live by example. There's not much you can do now. She obviously has made a choice and therefore in a sense she has used the judgement you have provided her with to make those decisions.
You can ask her if she's sexually active and using protection and other than that....just pray that you did a good job thus far.
Happy Living!
The Capt
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