A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I need some advice on something. Men hardly ever approach me or notice me. I see all types of women getting approached or complimented by men, but not me. Women seem to have nicer things to say. I am African-American, slim and 5'7". Some people say that I resemble Stacy Dash.Does anyone have any insight?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 September 2008): Simple if you are good looking most men will steer clear for fear of rejection. I was told this by ex model.Good luck
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 September 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks guys for your input. I try to be a friendly person and smile, but guys just don't notice. I don't think I'm as pretty as Stacy Dash, but my guy friends tell me that I look like her. I don't know what to do. Maybe it's because I live in the Midwest and here, guys like bigger, chubbier women.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 September 2008): LazyGuy is quite right in his analysis. You have to look available to any man that might show an interest in you. The next time you're in a social situation and someone you fancy catches your eye, make sure you catch his as well. All you have to do is look in his direction and as soon as you notice him looking at you, give him a nice smile. He might mistake this as just a friendly gesture so if he doesn't catch on, you might like to lick your lips as well. You may have to do this several times if he's a little slow on the uptake but sooner or later he'll get the message!
Never having heard of her, I googled Stacy Dash too and I can assure you that if I noticed someone who looks as good as she does smiling in my direction, it wouldn't be too long before I'd make an attempt to strike up some sort of conversation with her. (if I was single, that is!)
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (25 September 2008):
 Well, a google for Stacy Dash shows a mature woman who posed for playboy.
If you really look like that, then you just have to stop visiting gay bars.
There is a difference between noticing a woman and approaching her.
You may notice a woman but not approach her but it would hard to approach a woman you haven't noticed.
Part of the whole process of approaching a woman involves the guy deciding wether it is worth the effort. If the woman is deemed to be out of your league then you just don't bother, rejection hurts and your energy might better spend on a woman who is available to you.
You might give of the vibe that you are not looking or happily married.
Your looks, if they are indeed that of a model, might work against you as well. It ain't the fat girls that end up alone on new years eve. Fat girls we men can get, so those we approach while the models would never say yes, so never get asked.
Ask yourself, what image do you present to the outside world? What signals are you sending to men around you? It is hard to explain, but some women just have an air of "not intrested and most certainly not with you" that turns most men away. The attitude may not be intended but the damage is done.
If you have male friends, ask them honestly what they think of you. The first impression they got of you.
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