A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'm confused!!! And I hate it. I know this guy that goes to my job and I can't tell if I'm getting mixed signals from him or if I'm just getting paranoid and imagining I see some thing where there really isn't anything. I've been feeling like this for a while now and I guess I just need advice on it. He'll joke around with other people at my job but me and him are always bickering, not in any mean way more of he'll bring something up that he KNOWS I'll disagree with and it just usually snowballs from there and this past monday he said that we where just like the movie my cousin vinny. He'll notice if I change my hair or this one time when I put a more vibrant lipstick he asked why I was wearing makeup, when it was just a little lipstick. If I'm upset he'll try to cheer me up and he will side with me if one of my other coworkers are picking on me and such. He once told me that one of his sister friends looked just like me (personally I don't think she did but I digress). He'll also hold my gaze for more than a min some times when were talking and I've also caught him just randomly starring at me. But then there's times he'll come in and he'll just ignore me, won't say hello or even make an attempt to talk to me.This past day, me him and a coworker were talking and he was picking on me as per usual for my soccer team choice and he just grabbed my hand. It lasted for like a 1 min but still I'm getting more and more confused he playfully grabbed my arm on Wednesday too. So what is it with him? Is there a possibility he likes me or is he just really acting like a friend? Am I just seeing stuff where there really isn't anything? The thing is I think he might have a gf so that confuses me even more because if he does have one I really don't want him or any of my coworkers for that matter to think that I would hook up with someone that's in a relationship. And if he really is why would he reach out and grab some other girl hand for any matter? Especially a girl that he doesn't know like that?
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (15 March 2013):
 Personally, I belong to the school of thought says : mixed signals= no signals. With the possible exceptions of goofy teenagers or pathologically shy people, an adult who REALLY wants something, goes after it in a simple, linear way. I think that if this guy was really into you, after a SHORT inotial phase of skermishes to gauge your level of interest, ... it would not be so hard for him to invite you for drinks or coffee after work.
So why does he flirt ? And why does he flirt if he has a gf ?
Because you are a young attractive girl, and flirting is fun. Also people in relationships flirt , at times, they should not but they do. Because they like it. At work , then ? A flirt buddy at work is often a Godsend, it's a great help to kill time, offer some distraction, and keep fatigue and boredom away.
So, it may be innocuous flirting- or it may be that he wants to see if you " bite " and are up for a fling.
Either way, I would not put my hopes up too high. Of course, it is also not impossible that he is taken but he fell in love with you at first sight etc. etc.
Only," not impossible " is still very far from "probable ".
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