A
male
age
30-35,
*cclareng3
writes:I bumped to my best friend in high school, I used to like her so much but we stopped talking because I started having a girlfriend and she didn't like the fact that I had feelings for her. I never asked my best friend how I truly felt about her and that was when I was 14 so I never had closure with myself to truly move on. I've been through long term and short term relationships I always thought about her now and then..I'm 21 now and it's been 5 years since I ever had a real conversation with her. We finally met at a party and I finally built up the courage and tell her who I truly felt about her the whole time. We started talking and she told me that she thinks she always loved me and I didn't deny the fact that I loved her. The only problem is that at the time we talked about this, she just recently started seeing someone not to long ago.. She told me straight up that she loves him too and that she cares about and doesn't want to lead me on, but needs a best friend. I truly love this girl, but I don't want to lose her. I just don't know how to approach this part of my life. I want her to be happy, even though it hurts. And I know for a fact if I get in the middle, I will create resentment and cause too much pain. The question is do I let her go again or be a friend from afar? Has anyone ever been in my situation before, if so please share your story. Thank you
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 May 2013): I am currently in the same situation but its been 9 years since we seen or talked and he has a fiance. we both feel the same way about each other and talked about us being in a relationship. after i found out about his fiance ive been keeping my distance. However he did tell me he would leave everything behind for me if the oppurtunity was there. so how i see it is that he had a life before we started talkin again and i have mine. it is very hard to know how we both feel and can't do much about it right now. Of course i would love to be with him, I'm sure just as much as you, but the the only thing we can do is live our lives. live it the same before she came back in your life. like i told my guy if its meant to be it will happen on its own time. Don't lose contact with her but respect her relationship. Good luck and i hope everything goes well for both of us :)
A
female
reader, sugarplum786  +, writes (28 May 2013):
 It is best you keep your distance, you have expressed your interest and she has told you that she loves this guy she is seeing.
It will not help you move on as you likely to hope that you can be more than friends. THis is not healthy and will not allow you to move forward.
If she truely feels the same way, she will reach out to you. Let her relationship run its course and you start living and move on.
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