| A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years and I am not in love anymore. He's really a nice guy and I don't want to hurt his feelings. He's going to be very surprised and hurt when I tell him. I know he really cares about me but I don't feel anything anymore. How do I break up with him without hurting him? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, WhenCowsAttack  +, writes (24 August 2015):
It's going to hurt his feelings. There's no way around it.
Just be firm but as kind as you can about it. He's a grown man, he will live, trust me.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 August 2015): Trying to avoid hurting his feelings might hurt his feelings worse in the long run.
You will hurt his feelings no matter what so do it politely and a respectful way.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 August 2015): Is there somebody else you like?
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (23 August 2015):
 There is no easy way out. There is no way to spare him hurt feelings.
But... the sooner you do it, the BETTER for him. Staying with a guy because he is a GREAT guy, but you don't really love him... is stringing him along. And that is 10 times more hurtful.
And don't offer to be "friends" afterwards - maybe down the line when you are BOTH over each other friendship can grow, but it is not going to help either of you to stay "friends".
Good luck.
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A
female
reader, Pureflame  +, writes (23 August 2015):
You tell him exactly that. You are going to hurt his feelings if he really cares for you anyway.
In any other case I would ask you to consider if your feelings are only caused due to some other stresses in your life, but you seemed to have made up your mind. So, just be straight forward & honest.
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