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Dear Cupid > Forums > Cupid's Lounge > Curtain Rods

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Curtain Rods

, posted over a year ago

She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases. On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things. On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candle-light, put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of spring-water.

When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited a few half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar into the hollow of the curtain rods.

She then cleaned up the kitchen and left. When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days. Then slowly, the house began to smell. They tried everything; cleaning, mopping and airing the place out. Vents were checked for dead rodents and carpets were steam cleaned. Air fresheners were hung everywhere. Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a few days and in the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting.

Nothing worked!!!

People stopped coming over to visit. Repairmen refused to work in the house. The maid quit. Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.

A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not find a buyer for their stinky house. Word got out and eventually even the local estate agents refused to return their calls. Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.

The ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going. He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely and said that she missed her old home terribly and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back.

Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on a price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth, but only if She were to sign the papers that very day. She agreed and within the hour his lawyers delivered the paperwork.

A week later the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home, and to spite the ex-wife, they even took the curtain rods.

I LOVE A HAPPY ENDING, DON'T YOU?

Posted on 16 November 2008 @ 22:46 (London time) - permalink
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birdynumnumsbirdynumnums, posted over a year ago

Nice one, Uncle Phil. Kind of like the Mercedes Benz that I saw with the personalized license plate, WAS HIS!!! A woman scorned and all that...

Posted on 16 November 2008 @ 23:55 (London time) - permalink
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TELLULAHTELLULAH, posted over a year ago

Where is the new house, I think I will get ready to put in an offer!!

he!he! xxx

Posted on 17 November 2008 @ 15:32 (London time) - permalink
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BigSisBigSis, posted over a year ago

Hey Tellula!!

Where ya bin hon? I missed you.

I thought it was curtains for you.

:^p

Posted on 17 November 2008 @ 16:22 (London time) - permalink
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pepper27pepper27, posted over a year ago

He! This is a good one..

Over here this did happen..A woman who had been cheated on by her husband had been asked to sell the new car he had just brought her and give him half the money so he could start afresh as she through him out...It was in the paper Mini for sale £5 so my mate went to grab it for his sand racing spares, When he got there it of course was brand spanking new so asked her had she got the price wrong..No she did say and explained the story and how her husband was going to receive his £2-50 at 5pm as planned...LOL!!!!!

Posted on 17 November 2008 @ 16:51 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Nice one Uncy Phil.QT.

Spicey Pepsy!

That was lovely to read about.hee hee.

There was this antique collector.He went to see an old man who was selling his place and moving to his daughters.He told the antique collector.Sir,"I have this chair.I think its from my great grandfather's times.Can you please tell me how much its worth?".

The antique collector realized the chair was very valuable.He wanted to swindle the man.So he said "It looks good.But its not an antique at all.Its worth around 20 dollars.I can use it for firewood.The wood is completely rotten.Since you are so old I will pay you 5000 dollars to help you out.I am a generous man by heart.I love helping people"

In reality it was worth around a million bucks.The old man was happy.A deal was decided on.Money exchanged hands.The antique collector told the old man that he would be sending a truck and his men to collect it.

When the truck rolled in the collector ran up and greedily rubbed his hands in glee.He found that the chair was in irreparable pieces.He was livid and asked his men why did they do this?.They told him that the chair was too big to come out the doorway and the old man had told them it was not valuable and was worth only for being firewood.

Posted on 17 November 2008 @ 22:53 (London time) - permalink
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pepper27pepper27, posted over a year ago

WHOOPS! Bet he had a nice warm feeling inside without his fire lit :) huggys buggys XXXXXXXXXX

Posted on 18 November 2008 @ 8:18 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Now thats what I call a great Punch line!!Lots of Hugs and Loads of love to My dear spicey Pepsy!

Posted on 18 November 2008 @ 9:47 (London time) - permalink
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